


Things That Go Bump

by appending_fic



Series: Fire and Wonder [1]
Category: Gravity Falls, ParaNorman (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Awkwardness, Homophobic Language, Mystery, Other, Psychological Horror, Supernatural Elements, Teenagers, The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-02
Updated: 2014-12-05
Packaged: 2018-02-19 16:18:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 25,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2394869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/appending_fic/pseuds/appending_fic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Norman Babcock is touring the most haunted places in America, and his last stop this summer is Gravity Falls, a place with so many weird things going on, there have to be some spirits with major issues that need his help.</p><p>Very soon, however, he finds that Gravity Falls is a place in a category all its own, and that he might need a little help to keep from getting in over his head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Norman’s head bobbed against the window of Mitch’s car as the scenery rushed past. He wasn’t certain if the unfamiliar trees lining the road were the source of his sense of unease, or the knowledge that he was barreling toward another place plagued by hauntings. This had been his idea, but he was beginning to realize that dealing with the restless dead on a regular basis was draining; he was beginning to miss the friendly dead of Blithe Hollow.

He hit his head against the glass, banishing the thought. He was just tired of driving, he knew. The long stretches of boring road wore on him. Neil had shown much less resistance to road fatigue, and was snoring against the far window, while Courtney flicked aimlessly between radio channels in the passenger’s seat up front.

“There is absolutely nothing worth listening to. I officially hate Oregon.”

“You said that about Wisconsin and Colorado, and you ended up having good times,” Mitch said from the driver’s seat.

“Well, duh, because there were cool kids hanging around,” Courtney retorted. “The states as a whole? Blech.”

“There’s a lake in Gravity Falls. You could fish or swim or something when we get there,” Mitch suggested.

“If I hadn’t already seen every movie that came out this summer like twelve times, I’d just hole up in the movie theater.”

Mitch straightened and glanced slyly at Courtney. “We could see Tying the Not again.”

“I have seen that 15 times, and listened to you recount the whole movie to your boyfriend after every showing. No thanks.”

Norman shifted his attention away from the bickering teenagers who were allegedly his supervision for this trip. He was certain he was imagining that the trees looked sinister; he’d seen one too many haunted mansions this trip not to feel uneasy at even the most innocuous things. He’d spent all last night staring at an abstract painting hanging over his bed at the hotel, certain one of the triangles was staring at him.

A flash of white against the endless brown and green made Norman sit up and take notice. “Hey, we’re here!”

Indeed, a sign out of any stereotypical movie loomed on the edge of the road, welcoming them to Gravity Falls, Population ???

Neil proved to be less asleep than previously seemed when he sat bolt upright in his seat. “Hey, look, there’s a Mystery Shack! Can we go?”

Courtney groaned. “Gah, no. We’ve been to every stupid little tourist trap we’ve passed and they’ve all been a waste of time. Wall Drug, that stupid place in Wichita, and need I remind you of the Triskedecatorium?” They all shuddered in unison. “So forgive me if I don’t want to traipse through another underwhelming menagerie of horrors before someone tries to sell me overpriced snowglobes.”

“But-”

Courtney stiffened and spun on Norman. “No. You may be in charge of this stupid expedition, but you do not get to find some reasonable way to drag me into another dank shack.” She slumped back against her seat, breathing hard.

“You okay, dude?”

“I am fine,” Courtney retorted, a statement contradicted by her muttering, “I should have taken the job at the pool.”

They drove in silence for another minute before Norman risked speaking up again. “I was going to say that there’s bound to be someone at the Mystery Shack who knows something about any weird stuff that goes on here.” Not that they would need any help; Gravity Falls was reliably one of the weirdest places in the country (regardless what that kid in Indiana thought). While Norman had suggested this trip ostensibly for the purpose of touring haunted locations across the country, he’d really wanted a way to end up here. He’d found hints of stories and rumors about a place where the dead rose, where monsters haunted the woods, and where a pint-sized telepath had made his living.

Something that big had to have one angry spirit behind it.

Courtney sighed. “Fine. You can go quiz the staff at the Mystery Shack about weird stuff for fifteen minutes while I stay in the car, and then we’re getting to the hotel. I want to take an hour-long shower to get all this travel sweat off.”

“Plus your hair’s a little frizzy.”

Courtney rounded on Mitch, pointing an accusing finger at him. “Don’t. Or I will end you.”

Mitch obediently followed the signs on the side of the road until they reached a rambling, run-down A-frame building set at the back end of wide unpaved lot. Neil exploded out of his seat the moment they stopped, Norman following at a more sedate pace. He stepped gingerly around a large plaster ‘S’ that appeared to have fallen from the sign on the building’s roof, making it a “Mystery Hack”, not certain if the sign of disrepair was a bad sign or not.

Norman reached his friend as Neil stopped in the shadow of the Mystery Shack’s front porch, staring at the unremarkable door to the shack’s gift shop. “It’s so beautiful,” Neil whispered.

Norman chuckled and slapped the other boy on the back. “Well, go on. I’m going to do reconnaissance.”

“Come on!” Neil grabbed onto Norman’s arm, propelling both of them into the store in his rush. The interior was pretty much what Norman had come to expect of these sorts of tourist traps: shelves stuffed to overflowing with tchotchkes of dubious origin, ranging from snowglobes, skulls, and crystals to bumper stickers and hats with stupid designs on them. A teenager sat behind the counter staring at her phone and looking for all the world that this was the most boring place in existence.

Neil, of course, thought it was fantastic. “Oh my gosh, do you have a tour here?”

“We start in five minutes, my little mark.” A wide, unshaven man in a black suit and fez stepped out behind a rack of T-shirts, his arms spread wide.

“My name’s Neil.”

The man winked at him. “Of course. And I’m Stan, owner of this fantastic establishment. Come on, I’ll show you around.”

Norman let him go, because Neil had a talent for bumbling into useful tidbits while Norman was investigating. Besides, he hoped Neil ended up keeping that Mr. Pines occupied for more than their allotted 15 minutes.

“Hello!” A brunette a little shorter than Norman popped up over a rack of preserved squirrels and waved at him. She was grinning so widely it would have been creepy if her brown eyes didn’t radiate exuberance and good will to such a degree Norman didn’t believe it possible. She was wearing a bright green sweater with a unicorn cavorting on it. “Who are you?”

“Norman.” Norman didn’t have to reach out a hand, because the girl seized it and shook it vigorously.

“I’m Mabel! I work here - or my Grunkle Stan makes us work here while we’re staying with him - and I’m the public face of our new customer appreciation campaign, so I wanted you to know we appreciate you.”

She let go of Norman’s hand and stepped back, folding her arms behind her as she continued to grin. “How did I do? Are you feeling appreciated?”

“I’d have to say yes,” Norman replied. “You’re very enthusiastic.”

“And does that make you want to buy something? Grunkle Stan said I have to ask that.” Mabel offered the last with a brief weakening to her grin.

“Um, I guess? I was sort of looking around anyway. Hey, is all this stuff around here real?”

“Haha, no. The only really cool thing I’ve seen in here was a grappling gun, and you’re too late to get that, Norman.” She cocked her finger at him like a gun and blew at the tip. “I mean, if you like horns stapled to bunnies and junk like that, you can totally go with Grunkle Stan. Or you can stay here! With me!” 

Her eyes abruptly widened and her gaze drifted past Norman’s right shoulder. He turned to see Mitch letting the front door slam behind him as he knelt to examine a mug with Bigfoot plastered on it. “Oh. My. God. He’s amazing.”

“Mitch? I guess he is pretty cool sometimes.”

“You know him?” Mabel grabbed Norman’s hands and dragged him close. “Could you introduce us? No, wait, it’ll be better if I run into him spontaneously by the ice cube trays. I hope you enjoy your time at the Mystery Shack!”

“Wait!” Mabel was gone before Norman could save her the trouble of flirting with a gay boy three years older than her, leaving him to browse through a box of Magic 8 Balls. He picked one up and shook it. “Am I going to help the spirit in Gravity Falls?”

The ball must have been broken, because Norman didn’t get an answer, just a little bubble of air suspended in the center of the window.

“Those give really unhelpful advice.”

Norman glanced up. A brown-haired boy in a blue vest was standing next to an Employees Only sign. Unlike Mabel, who looked so much like him Norman estimated that the chance of them not being siblings to be roughly negative, the boy had a serious expression that put a few years on a face that probably wasn’t older than Norman’s. The boy stepped forward and plucked the 8 ball from Norman’s hand and tossed it back in the box. “Grunkle Stan says they’re junk, but they keep telling people to burn the world.”

“Well I just got an air bubble, so I’ll take that as a good sign.” It was, in truth, a lot more promising than visions of flame and terror. “Do you work here?”

“Yeah,” the boy replied with a shrug. “It’s pretty cool, even if Grunkle Stan doesn’t keep anything real around here.”

“You mean like ghosts and stuff?”

“Yeah...stuff.” Something about the boy’s demeanor closed off at that point, and Norman knew he’d been right to come to the Mystery Shack. Only someone who’d dealt with the supernatural in a world that didn’t believe could look so hunted at the mention of spirits.

“Well, I’ve been touring the most haunted places in America, and Gravity Falls kept popping up. You ever met any ghosts?”

“Did he ever.” The girl at the front counter vaulted it and wandered over toward the two of them. She was smiling predatorily. The other boy’s face paled as she approached. “There was a haunted convenience store; he kicked them right to the curb.”

Norman’s heart sank. He’d actually gotten excited about the prospect of meeting someone else who’d experienced the spirit world the way he did, but now he could see this kid knew absolutely nothing. He was, he decided, probably trying to impress the cashier, or possibly just trying to keep up with Mabel. Anyone with any real experience with ghosts would know kicking them to the curb was worse than useless; you’d only upset them more that way.

“Anyway, I gotta find my friend and go. Mitch! We’re leaving!”

“Okay, little dude!”

It took a few moments to get out of the shop and find Neil bouncing just outside a door that proved to be the exit to the tour area. As they pulled away from the Mystery Shack, Norman caught sight of Mabel waving to him; he offered a wave back.

“What is that? Were you talking to a little girlfriend in there?” Courtney swiveled around to grin at Norman.

“Hey! That’s a - a het-er-o-norm-a-tive question!” Neil’s face was crinkled in concentration as he recited a longer word than he was used to.

“A what?”

Still concentrating, Neil continued. “Just because Norman was talking to a girl doesn’t mean he wants to date her. It’s like when you spent all that time hanging around because you liked Mitch.” He grinned as Courtney, flushing, snapped her head away from him, and, thankfully, dropped the subject.

Neil grinned at Norman and raised his hand to bump fists. Norman complied, some of the tension in his chest easing. His sister meant well - the fallout from Agatha’s appeasement proved that - but she spent a lot of time quizzing Norman about every girl he interacted with, like, ever. Anything that distracted her from the topic at hand was worth a fist-bump.

“So, you get any leads?”

Norman rolled his eyes and dropped his head back against the headrest. “No. They were bragging about beating up ghosts. I doubt anyone in there has even met a ghost, much less gotten rid of one.”

“Well, were there any ghosts around the Mystery Shack you could ask?”

Norman’s heart skipped a beat at Neil’s question, because he realized why he’d been uneasy as long as they’d been near Gravity Falls.

Everywhere in the world, the dead lingered near their places of death or burial. In time, they all faded away, moving on. Norman could see those lingering spirits, and could converse with them. As a result, the green specters were a natural part of any scene Norman saw. And because the sight of the dead was familiar, Norman hadn’t noticed it was gone until someone called attention to it.

Norman hadn’t seen a single spirit since they’d entered Gravity Falls. It couldn’t possibly mean that no one had ever died here.

Which meant, instead...what?

Nothing good, Norman would bet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahaha, you're reading this? I really wouldn't if I were you. Maybe I'm biased; I've already SEEN this, and frankly watching these kids bumble around for days isn't my idea of a good time. But maybe it's yours, and I shouldn't judge. I WILL, but that's my choice, right?
> 
> If you're going to insist on pressing forward, of course, just let me warn you.
> 
> Don't read the epilogue.
> 
> Obviously I can't stop you - I can, actually, but I choose not to - but I KNOW you won't like it.
> 
> Just stop at the last chapter.
> 
> You'll thank me.
> 
> Really.


	2. Chapter 2

The girl at the Mystery Shack had mentioned a haunted convenience store, so that was where Norman started. It had taken only a few minutes with a computer to identify the place she’d probably meant - the Dusk and Dawn. The next morning, he had Mitch drive him to the store alone, and then just stood outside the fence.

The absence of any souls still unnerved him, but now that he recognized the reason for his unease, Norman could actually consider what was going on. He knew people like him and Agatha could influence the dead, among other things. The thought of what someone could do to clear out an entire community of the dead, though, was...worrying.

Once he’d lingered long enough to determine there was no active malevolence as there had been near Agatha’s grave, Norman began to climb the fence. It took only a few moments to get inside, and once there, he paused. While there had been no active malevolence outside, the rundown convenience store had a sense of watchfulness about it.

“Mr. and Mrs. Duskerton? Um, my name’s Norman Babcock. I wanted to talk to you, please?”

Two green forms, of a portly man and woman dressed in an apron and skirt and coat, faded into view. The woman gave Norman a kind smile. “Good morning, Norman. We’re not used to visitors this early, you know.”

“‘I’m sorry. I just felt I needed to talk to you two and I thought, why not earlier than later?”

Mrs. Duskerton chuckled. “Ah, aren’t you a nice young man! Would you like a snack?”

Norman glanced sidelong at the shelves, filled with food sealed in wrappers and well beyond their sell date. “No, thank you. I mostly just wanted to talk.”

Mr. Duskerton, scowling, abruptly soared to inches from Norman’s face. “Boy! Are you a...teenager?”

“Well, yeah, I turned 13 a couple of months ago-”

Norman dodged aside as a soda machine was ripped out of the wall and hurtled for him. Mr. Duskerton’s face was twisted with an expression of fury, and so Norman didn’t hesitate when he landed, scrambling out of the way when a set of shelves tipped over, nearly crushing him. Before the ghost could make another attack, though, the air suddenly became abnormally still.

He looked up, and saw Mrs. Duskerton standing in front of her husband, scowling herself. “Pa! Behave yourself!”

“But he’s a teenager! A rotten little-”

“He’s a nice young man,” Mrs. Dusterton said primly, folding her arms. “He hasn’t come in with his raps music or low-hanging pants or broken anything. And he said please and thank you.” Under the force of his wife’s glare, Mr. Duskerton wilted.

“Alright, you do what you want,” he growled.

Mrs. Duskerton turned back to Norman, all smiles again. “So what is it you wanted to talk about, Norman?”

“I wanted to know about Gravity Falls,” Norman said. “Are you the only ghosts here? Is there anything else weird going on around here?”

Mrs. Duskerton’s smile faded. Mr. Duskerton’s scowl, if anything, deepened, and he shifted to his wife’s side, hovering protectively. “I think you ought to leave, boy,” Mr. Duskerton muttered.

Norman nodded and took a step back. “Right. I get it. It’s been a pleasure; I hope your twilight years are filled with good times-”

“Stop it, Pa. You stay right there, young man.” Mrs. Duskerton floated forward, and when she was close enough, she wrapped up Norman in an ethereal hug. “You should stop talking about this, Norman. Gravity Falls is...strange. Something about it gets in your head and twists things around.”

“And wasn’t that a relief, dying,” Mr. Duskerton said. “My head felt clearer than it had in decades!”

“Is there some sort of super-ghost here?” Norman asked. “Something that messes around with people?”

“I don’t think you understand, boy.” Mr. Duskerton grumbled. “The ghosts here are the least of your problems. There are things in this town that can rip into your mind and leave a shattered ruin full of nightmares.”

“Oh, don’t fill his head with boogums. He’s going to have his hands full with the trolls and gnomes and things without worrying about stuff like - like that.”

Norman snorted. “I don’t believe in stuff like that.”

“Says the boy talking to ghosts?”

“You’d be amazed what ghosts can do without there being gnomes around,” Norman replied. “But you said there are big things here. I’ve...dealt with dangerous things. People. Because sometimes I’m the only person who can see them, who can understand them.”

The Duskertons exchanged a silent look before Mrs. Duskerton took a deep breath (or imitated one out of habit). “Well. If you’re going to run around trying to solve everyone’s problems, you should probably look up the Pines boy. He’s a sweetie, just like you-”

“If his raging hormones haven’t ruined his attitude. You remember how the nice kids would turn just like that when they hit 13.”

“Oh, no. A boy like that, who’d do that sweet little Lamby Lamby Dance to save his friends’ lives, isn’t going to change just because of a little hormones. So you want to find little Dipper Pines and his sister Mabel.”

“What do they look like?”

Mr. Duskerton frowned and snapped his fingers, bringing a small television hooked up to the security camera to life. It showed a boy, about 12 or 13, dressed in a lamb costume and dancing. For all that it might have been the most embarrassing moment of his life, the brown-haired boy in the costume looked enthusiastic about it. There was something earnest in those brown eyes that Norman hadn’t seen when he'd spoken to the boy in the store.

“His friend said he kicked your butts,” Norman said as the dance drew to a close.

“Ah, you know how boys are, never wanting to be seen doing something ‘girly’,” Mrs. Duskerton said. “He was really quite sweet. I think you’d get along. And if you’re going to run off facing down who-knows-what, you’d best have him along.”

“Well, thanks,” Norman said. “I’ll make sure to do that. And you two have a nice afterlife; try not to get too worked up over the living!”

Mitch was on the phone when Norman got out; he waved at Norman and held up a “one minute” gesture. Norman settled against the fence and watched idly. He worried sometimes where he’d be if he hadn’t befriended Neil and Mitch. Neil was casually open-minded, and enthusiastic about so much that it was easy to talk to him about feeling weird or out-of-place, and Mitch reminded him that someone who was weird could still be admired. It had made things easier, in the years since Agatha.

“Hey, you ready to head back?”

“We just have one stop to make.”

Norman was going to see Dipper Pines eventually, but before he sought out assistance, he was going to look into one more source. Ten minutes later, Mitch pulled up to the edge of the Gravity Falls graveyard, but this time, he got out with Norman.

“No protests. You said you knew what was in that store, but this is uncharted territory.”

Norman didn’t argue. It wasn’t like he needed to be on his own to talk to ghosts; they were used to people not seeing them, so didn’t think much of having people around. Mostly.

But the graveyard was as lifeless as the rest of Gravity Falls, empty of any lingering spirit, or even the pale mist of a place where death gathered. Norman walked a circuit of the entire place, just to be sure, but he found nothing, until he came to the tombstone of someone named Quentin Tre-something, the entire right side of the stone cracked and worn away. Written on the stone in bright green letters, were the words “NOTHING DEAD HERE.”

“Do you see that?”

Mitch peered at the tombstone. “Some old dude who lived like a hundred years ago?”

Norman stared, and felt a shiver run down his spine. A warning written such that only someone like Norman could see it meant that something was wrong with Gravity Falls, something that someone like Norman was needed to help fix.

“Come on,” Norman said to Mitch. “We’re heading back to the hotel, and I’m...well, we’ll figure out what we’re doing later.”

He placed his hand on the tombstone, tracing the design set above the name, something like the eye design on dollar bills. Then he stepped away and led Mitch out of the graveyard.

“So what’s up?” Mitch asked.

Norman considered his words. Mitch wasn’t stupid, just...uncomplicated, and preferred the world to be the same. So sometimes it was hard to explain to him how the dead worked, because they were complicated.

“There aren’t ghosts in Gravity Falls. Well, barely any.”

“That’s good, right?” Mitch hopped into the car and Norman followed as he considered his words.

“It’s not…look, everything leaves behind a ghost. Most go away after only a little bit, and some linger longer. This is the only place I’ve seen that doesn’t have any ghosts at all.”

“So you’re worried.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Don’t worry too much about it, dude. I’m sure you’ll figure out a way to fix everything.” Mitch reached over and ruffled Norman’s hair. “We’ve all got faith in you, bro.”

Norman’s cheeks flushed with heat that he knew he couldn’t hide. It startled him not only to hear that anyone believed in him, but the casual signs from Mitch and Neil that they thought of him somewhere in the vein of family.

Mitch didn’t mention the blush, although Norman wasn’t certain if it was from politeness or obliviousness.

In any case, when they reached the hotel it was still before noon. Neil had just woken up and Courtney still had her sleep mask over her eyes, though Norman knew from experience she was awake and just putting off the moment she had to get up and interact with people.

"Are you alive?" he asked the lump of blankets.

"No. I died in the middle of the night and just haven't started to stink yet."

"Really?" Neil's expression brightened. "Because if you did, then I can hear you, and that means I've got powers like Norman!"

"No," Courtney sighed. "I was hoping to get another hour or sleep."

"But we've got to get out and hunt ghosts!" Neil wailed. "Saving the day for the living and dead alike - that's our raisin deter."

"That's your reason, maybe," Courtney said. She folded back her blankets and sat up revealing her mauve pajamas. "Mom and Dad promised me a car if I kept an eye on you all summer. And I've decided we're going to spend at least one day relaxing before we get dragged into another adventure."

She had a right to be bitter, Norman thought, even as Neil adopted a mournful, put-upon expression at having his raison d'etre delayed by the whims of a common teenager. She'd slipped out of their parents' focus after the whole thing with Agatha, and he knew the promise of a car was less incentive for Courtney to go with Norman than consolation for making her.

When she saw him staring, she took on a resolute expression, readying herself to argue. It was a nice reminder that they weren't all that different from each other, he thought, unyielding when they had to fight.

"That's fine. I need a rest from all that driving. Come on, Neil, we can check out the pool or something."

He ignored Neil's protests and Courtney's look of gratitude. He didn't want to admit that Gravity Falls _was_ getting to him. The thought of jumping right back into his investigations, something which the Duskertons had all but told involved things deeper and more dangerous that ghosts, had him on edge. He didn't need to talk to Dipper Pines and leap straight in over his head with all this stuff.

He didn't want to let any of them see he was thinking of maybe just leaving Gravity Falls behind. It had someone to look after it, and that surely had to be good enough. These thoughts pursued him as he watched Neil cannonball into the pool. He knew, deep down, that Neil, that they all would understand if he couldn't keep going. But it still hurt, thinking of being the boy who'd run into the woods to face down a witch, and at the same time being the boy who gave up just because a town was a little creepy.

The fear and shame followed him to sleep that night; he remembered vague forms shouting at him in muffled voices, and shadows swirling around him. He awoke with a shout just as a painting fell from the wall and clattered into his pillow. It was a cinematic view of Egypt, the Great Pyramids faded from sunlight and age.

Jittery and still overwhelmed with conflicting feelings, Norman begged off joining the others for breakfast the next morning. Leaving a note he hoped explained needing to work on his own, he took off into the woods that seemed to extend a little bit into every place in Gravity Falls. He didn't want to stay here, but the only thing he wanted less than that was to tell them that he didn't want to. Norman had intended to just walk anywhere, but in the end, he just sat under a withered pine tree and tried to find a place in his head that didn't make him feel sick with guilt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m always WATCHING


	3. Chapter 3

Dipper ambled along the trails that cut through the woods of Gravity Falls, hands stuffed in the pockets of his vest. Grenda and Candy were currently making his room uninhabitable, so, in the absence of any pressing mysteries, he was basking in the silence afforded by a lazy day.

He was, in truth, also trying to clear his head. When he’d run into that kid in the Mystery Shack, the one who’d been hunting ghosts, he’d experienced a moment of - hope, maybe? He couldn’t quite decipher what he’d felt, actually. Excitement, certainly. No one around here was really interested in the weirdness of Gravity Falls, not in the actively curious way he was. Sure, everyone would help deal with the crisis of the week, but only as a distraction from the parts of their lives they looked forward to. 

And then Dipper had done or said something and the kid’s eyes had gone distant and he’d excused himself at the earliest opportunity. Wendy had apologized for interrupting, but Dipper didn’t have it in him to tell her it wasn’t her fault. The kid had just realized what everyone did, eventually: Dipper was weird, and not the sort of person you were friends with. He was...happy having friends here, happy that someone other than Mabel could look at him and see someone worth knowing, but it was a nervous happiness, because he knew one day they’d all realize what everyone back home did and drop him.

Gravity Falls was a billion times better than home, but he knew that wouldn’t be true once they realized the truth, and Dipper was left exploring the unknown on his own again.

He paused mid-step at an unusual sound, waiting to determine if it was a sound for investigating or a sound for fleeing. When the sound repeated itself, it was a whimper, and that...didn’t help; he’d read about the Crying Eviscerator and jeez he was going to have to decide whether to investigate or not without having any clear evidence one way or another.

So...trust no one or take a chance?

Dipper stepped behind a tree, using it as cover as he carefully edged around it, ready to bolt if this turned out to be an evil teddy bear or something.

When he thought he was far enough around to see, he peered around the tree. A boy in a red hoodie pulled over his head was curled up under a tree about ten feet away. He didn’t whimper again, but Dipper could hear him sniffling quietly.

Dipper tried to sink into the tree surface, wishing he’d walked away. If he walked out there, both he and the boy would have to deal with the fact that the boy was crying, and that Dipper had seen him, quite possibly the most embarrassing situation possible for boys.

And that meant Dipper was stuck here for the duration, unless he wanted to try sneaking away.

The boy on the ground sniffled again and wiped at his face. “Get it together, Norman. You’ve dealt with worse than this.”

Pressed against the tree, Dipper felt his fists clench. He was pretty sure Mabel had said the boy in the Mystery Shack had been named Norman. And that meant...maybe he should talk to the kid? Or leave?

He’d about convinced himself to confidently stride away and pretend he hadn’t seen anything when Norman spoke again.

“I can leave if I’m bothering you.”

Caught, Dipper stepped away from the tree. He tried to look nonthreatening, something Soos said came naturally to him and that Dipper wasn't sure if he should take as a compliment.

"Sorry. You weren't bothering me. But I guess I was worried because you seemed upset, and there aren't a lot of people out here unless it's snipe season-" Dipper snapped his mouth shut when he realized he was babbling. "Sorry. If you need a quiet place to be alone, I can go."

"Heh. You _are_ a nice kid." The other boy sounded amused, even if his voice still wavered a little, a sign that it wouldn't take much to start him up again. He pushed himself off the ground, reached out a hand and smiled at Dipper. "I'm Norman."

"Dipper." Norman was a little on the pale side, making him look a little like a ghost, with stark blue eyes and wild, upright hair underneath his hoodie. As he shook Dipper's hand, Norman tilted his head, examining Dipper for signs of who knows what. He must have liked what he saw, because he only stepped back a step after letting go of Dipper's hand. He did not, however, seem inclined to speak, as he jammed his hands into the pockets of his hoodie and let his gaze drop.

"Um. Were you okay? Or are you? I don't want to be nosy but you seemed a little...down."

Norman shrugged. "Just feeling a little overwhelmed."

"Yeah, Gravity Falls will do that to you." Norman's gaze, sharper and more penetrating than before, snapped to Dipper, but when Dipper was about to ask what was wrong, Norman looked away. Rather than press him, Dipper decided to seize on the one thing he knew they had in common. "You said you were looking for ghosts, right?"

"My friends and I have been touring all the haunted places in America. I thought Gravity Falls would be a nice cap to it all."

Dipper hated the paranoia that Gravity Falls had instilled in him, the voice picking apart every word and gesture in the hopes of exposing inevitable betrayal before he was surprised by it. But he could feel the gaps in Norman's statement, something he wasn't telling Dipper. He couldn't be sure it was dangerous, but in Gravity Falls, it usually was.

"Are you some sort of Ghost Buster?"

Norman raised one eyebrow, and his lips quirked upward in an almost-smile that vanished instantly. "Not quite. I'm just interested in them. And interested why Gravity Falls doesn't have many ghost...stories."

Dipper couldn't keep from grinning in response to that. "That's because the stories in Gravity Falls are ten times weirder than any ghost. Did you know they celebrate Halloween twice a year?" He paused, half-remembered conversations with Wendy and Mabel materializing in his memory. "Geez, it's next week, even. And it's legal to marry woodpeckers, and we actually have a Finders-Keepers law - of course that doesn't mean there aren't ghosts here." Despite the weirdness of Gravity Falls out-weirding everywhere else, Dipper felt an urge to defend the town's post-mortem residents. "There was a zombie plague last year, and there's an old couple who haunt their old convenience store."

Norman was smiling - not broadly, but almost...smug? It wasn't mean, so Dipper had to assume he was just interested in all that stuff.

"Just about the only thing I haven't seen are aliens."

Norman made a quiet, agreeable sound before abruptly sitting and settling against the tree Dipper had used as cover.

"Sounds like you've got your hands full, dealing with all that weirdness."

“Well, I don’t like to brag, but-”

“That’s a shocker!”

Dipper screamed. In a manly way. It was really more of a grunt than anything. It was not a yelp that transformed halfway through into a high-pitched squeak. But he was justified in being startled, as his sister, driving the golf cart, screeched to a spinning halt in between a large gap in the trees. She hopped down, followed by Candy and Grenda, and waved enthusiastically at Dipper.

"Hey Dipper! Hey Norman!"

"How did you find me? Have you been following me?" Dipper demanded.

Mabel grinned and wiggled her fingers. "Maybe our twin telepathy powers have finally activated! Neat, huh?"

"Actually, we used Waddles to find you. Pigs are quite intelligent, and have keen senses of smell." Waddles oinked helpfully from the back of the cart.

"Way to ruin the surprise, Candy," Mabel groaned. Her frustration was short-lived, however, as she hopped closer, grinning at Dipper. “So what are you two up to? Are you on secret adventures? Can we come?”

Dipper winced; he’d normally be happy to see Mabel, but he didn’t think Norman wanted to put up with someone else when he’d been crying just a few minutes ago.

“Actually, we were about to go off and do, um, guy stuff.”

“Guy stuff?” Mabel raised one eyebrow. “I thought you were done with that after the Manotaurs.”

“I wasn’t done with, you know, hanging out with the guys, just with punching things with my face.” Dipper folded his arms. Norman just gave him a questioning look Dipper was absolutely not going to respond to as long as Mabel was here.

“Hm. Well, Norman here owes me a good time anyway because he didn’t warn me his friend’s brother was gay.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Oh it’s alright. I’ve come to terms with my tragic lot in life, to always find that the good ones are taken, or gay.” Mabel raised a hand to her forehead in a dramatic pose.

“Which one was Mermando?”

Mabel’s face switched to a wide grin. “Oh, when I saw the look in his eyes as you locked lips with him-”

“It was CPR!” Dipper snapped.

“Who was I to stand in the way of true love?”

Dipper snarled and tackled his sister, sending both of them tumbling to the ground. Mabel was laughing, and when Dipper tried to get her into a headlock, she resorted to tickling.

“Gah - stop it, Mabel, stop it, stop it!”

“Haha, never! This is revenge for you taking all the good boys!” Mabel then vaulted off of Dipper and gave Norman a smile. “He’s a real man’s man, you know.”

Dipper scrambled to his feet, hoping the flush on his cheeks would be easily mistaken for exertion. “I’m not the one chasing after every boy in town.” He took a deep breath, trying to center himself, and gave Norman an apologetic smile. “Mabel’s a little silly sometimes.”

“Oh no, Mabel’s a little silly all the time,” Candy offered.

“She’s amazing,” Grenda said.

“Haha, oh girls.” Mabel folded her arms and leaned on Dipper’s head, shifting to keep her balance as Dipper tried to shove her away. She’d managed to grow another three inches over the past year, leaving Dipper as a handy armrest. “I know I’m great, but you don’t need to go on. So how about it, Norman? You wanna hang?”

Norman looked over at Dipper, mouth twisting a little, as if he was conferring with Dipper. Dipper shrugged; he was ambivalent at this point, so if Norman wanted to spend time with the girls, he wasn’t going to stand in his way.

“You could come over to our hotel; I bet Neil and Courtney and Mitch are back.”

“Ooh! I bet they’ve got minibars!” Mabel hopped back onto the cart and waved at Candy and Grenda. “We’ll meet you there, Norman. Come on, girls!”

They rocketed away, leaving Norman with Dipper in the now-empty clearing. He was watching after them for a moment before looking back at Dipper and shrugged.

"If you don't want to hang with us, I'm sure we could come up with an excuse before we catch up with them."

"I'll be fine." Norman stood and brushed off his pants. "I bet Mabel'd get along with Neil like a house on fire, and what sort of little brother would I be if I didn't inflict my friends on Courtney every now and again?"

Dipper offered Norman a weak smile in response. "We're friends?"

"Sure. Us ghost hunters need to stick together, right?"

"Sure! I mean, okay."

"Now, I assume you know how to get us to the motel, because I am lost."

Dipper tried a confident smile this time around. "I've been chased through these woods often enough to find any place around here with my eyes closed."

Norman just stepped back and swung out his arms, inviting Dipper to lead the way. The walk back was quieter, as Norman seemed to have talked himself out and Dipper didn't want to intrude. Or maybe Norman was still upset and trying to keep it together. Dipper didn't think so, but he wasn't exactly an expert.

They arrived at the motel just in time to see Mabel cheering on as Waddles took a wild leap into the pool, sending water flying everywhere and earning a chuckle from the lifeguard-

"Wendy? What are you doing here?"

Sprawled in a chair high above the pool, Wendy shrugged, brushing a lock of hair from her eyes. "This place is much more laid back than the public pool, and they have better snacks. Who's your new friend there?"

"This is Norman." Norman waved and Wendy gave him a neutral smile. "He's staying here for a bit."

"Yeah, like two weeks. How about I go see if Neil's around and you stay here for a bit?"

Norman slipped away; Wendy hopped down and mussed Dipper's hair.

"So how are you doing? I haven't seen you much at the Shack."

Dipper shrugged, finding his words failing him. "Fine."

Wendy just snorted, amused. "Wow. You really are a teenager now, all moody and stuff. I bet you drive Mabel crazy like that."

Dipper shoved Wendy a few steps away. "I'm not acting moody. I just-"

"Yeah, you got plenty to be moody about. Dipper, I get it. I've been there." She flashed him a tiny grin. "But you've got plenty of friends out here to keep you from getting too moody." When Dipper didn't reply immediately, she grabbed him and pulled him into a headlock.

"Ah! Let go!"

Wendy started giving Dipper a noogie as he struggled, laughing. "Not until you cheer up, Dipper. Just one little smile."

"Fine!" Dipper plastered on the widest, creepiest smile he could manage. Wendy snorted and let go of him, so Dipper took the chance to get a little distance and sort out his hair.

Wendy stepped in while Dipper frowned in concentration, leaning down. "You _are_ okay, right, Dipper?"

"Yeah, of course." He was okay, really. It had just been so weird when he'd gotten back to Gravity Falls and had seen Wendy and...it hadn't been weird. She was the same as she'd always been, fun and pretty and pretty good with an axe, except that Dipper didn't feel the churning in his stomach when she smiled at him. He hadn't known how to deal with her without that lingering sense of attraction, but seeing her laughing, easy with him, Dipper suspected he'd just grown up a little.

Maybe he'd even gotten over Wendy, but it was a shock to realize he didn't like her any less for that.

"Friends, right?"

She looked down at Dipper, startled, but then her expression softened, a fond smile taking its place on her face. "Yeah, Dipper. Always."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FRIENDS ARE JUST ENEMIES THAT AREN’T DEAD YET


	4. Chapter 4

Dipper leaned back against the roof access to the motel; he’d scrambled up here after only a few minutes, seeking refuge from the chaos below. Wendy had offered him a wink when he’d left, and he’d caught sight of her running interference when Mabel or Grenda tried to get him back down. She had not, he noticed, tried to prevent Norman when he’d followed Dipper up.

Silence had reigned up until the point Neil shoved Mabel into the pool and Waddles retaliated with a charge worthy of a last stand.

“So, tell me about this place. You don’t have a lot of ghosts, so what goes on here?”

“Last Summerween, I was almost eaten by a monster made out of rejected candy.”

Norman didn’t respond for a long moment. “I...really wasn’t expecting that.”

“Is that good or bad?”

Norman chuckled. “Interesting.” He twisted himself around until he had his feet propped up on the wall and his head on the roof. “When I asked myself what happens in Gravity Falls, I thought it’d be ghosts and the odd Loch Ness Monster.”

“I bet you didn’t think there were rugs that switch people’s bodies around, either.”

Norman kneed Dipper in the side and glared at him. “You’re messing with me.”

“It’s the truth,” Dipper protested, trying to keep from sounding too offended. “Everyone back at the Mystery Shack can back me up.”

“Nah. I’ll just take your word for it.” Norman’s glare gave way to a hesitant smile. “Unless you really are messing with me.”

Dipper let out an explosive breath. “Gravity Falls is weird enough without me making stuff up.” He let silence fall again for a moment before he risked saying, “Thanks, though. For trusting me.”

“I had to put up with stuff like that a couple years ago,” Norman replied. “So I know how it feels.” He reached out and patted Dipper’s knee; the warmth of his touch lingered even as Norman returned his hands to his chest, staring at the sky.

Dipper tried to organize his thoughts; it was disconcerting to have someone trying to relate to him, given that he tended to deal mostly with Mabel who didn’t relate with reality, let alone other people. “What got you started ghost hunting?”

“Old family history.” At Dipper’s glare, Norman shrugged. “It’s this whole, big thing. I got dragged into the middle of a whole bunch of old grudges and I had to smooth everything over, and...well, it turns out I’m a good listener.”

“The Ghost Whisperer!” Dipper declared. It earned a chuckle from Norman, so he considered it a win. “So you’ve been sweeping up and down the country looking for ghosts who just need a good talking to?”

“Hm,” Norman said. “I know it doesn’t sound heroic-”

“I don’t know. I’d love an opportunity to talk it out. The last time I just stood up and talked at someone they threw me out of their secret society. Mostly, Mabel and I just try surviving.”

Norman gave Dipper a sidelong glance and a warm smile. “That’s good, too.”

“Norman! We’re gonna get burgers!”

Norman swiveled right-side up and waved down at Neil. “We’ll be right down!” He patted Dipper’s shoulder and moved to the edge of the roof before glancing back. “Are you joining us?”

“Well, Grunkle Stan isn’t much for paying us, well, anything, but I’m sure I can manage.” Dipper joined Norman on the edge of the roof, crouching to jump down.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m the one inviting you out; I can handle it.” Norman’s smile was strained, or uneasy, but Dipper had never been one to pass up free food.

“Sure. Now let’s get down there.”

Dipper wasn’t sure how Mabel conned Mitch into paying for her and her friends; he didn’t seem like the sort who was easily charmed, even though he was casually nice to all of them.

They had gotten burgers to go from the diner before retiring to a set of picnic tables. Courtney had drawn Wendy away; he wasn’t entirely certain if Wendy was enjoying herself, but he decided to leave it alone unless it looked like violence was imminent. When he tried to sit next to Norman, though, he found the other boy surrounded by girls, Mabel and her friends having commandeered him. That left Dipper to join Neil and Mitch on the far end of the table Courtney and Wendy were occupying. At Dipper’s glance, Wendy shrugged and waved at him, so he settled next to the round redhead who was apparently a good enough friend that Norman had dragged him across the country on a ghost hunt.

“Hey, you’re Dipper, right?”

“The one and only.”

“Where’d that name come from? It seems a little weird.”

Dipper shook his head. “You gotta know me a lot better before I tell you that.”

“Aww, come on! I can keep secrets really good!” Neil looked up at Dipper with wide eyes, giving him an innocent smile. “I won’t even tell Norman, promise.”

Dipper sighed. “Forget about it. It’s just dumb.” He pulled up the fringe of his hair to reveal his birthmark. “You see?”

“Wowwww. Hey, Norman! You gotta see this! Dipper’s like Harry Potter or something!”

As Norman gave Neil a quizzical look, Mabel rose from her seat like a rocket.

“Dipper! Did you not tell me you’re a wizard? Did you meet Dumbledore and forget to tell me? IS OUR ENTIRE LIFE A LIE?”

She launched herself off of the top of the table, sending several burgers careening to the ground, which Waddles went after with glorious abandon. She grabbed Dipper by the front of his vest and shook, eyes wild with excitement.

“Ow, jeez, Mabel!” Dipper loosened Mabel’s grip enough to back away. “I’m not a wizard-”

“So he says.”

“Neil just liked my birthmark.”

“Oh my gosh, yes! Norman, come on, take a look.” Mabel darted back and dragged Norman to Dipper’s table, and then reached out to lift up Dipper’s bangs. “See?”

The others leaned in to get a glance of Dipper’s forehead. Norman just stared at the constellation-shaped birthmark until Dipper began to feel a little uncomfortable.

“Um, Mabel?”

She drew back and grinned at everyone as if she’d pulled off a magic trick. Norman, however, was still staring at Dipper thoughtfully.

“So is that why your parents named you Dipper?”

“Ah...no.”

“Haha, definitely no,” Mabel agreed. “You think you’ve heard embarrassing stories about Dipper, but nothing, _nothing_ tops the secret of his real name.”

Wendy, who had not joined the Let’s Stare at Dipper game, snapped her head up and gave Dipper a look, one that would have made him trip over himself to share with her once upon a time. But he just mimed locking his mouth at her. She shook her head, smiling.

“I wish I had a cool birthmark,” Neil muttered. “I just got a mole on my butt.”

“Me, too! MOLE BUDDIES!” Neil joined an impromptu high-five with Mabel before Mabel latched onto Norman’s arm. “Alright, you’re coming with us, buddy.”

Neil dropped back to his seat and dragged Dipper down. “Come on.”

Dipper glanced back at Norman and Mabel; she was talking animatedly to him, making an occasional gesture toward Dipper. “What is she talking about over there?”

Neil shrugged. “Who knows? She just told me to keep you busy, which is okay, because you seem like a cool guy, otherwise Norman wouldn’t be talking to you.”

“Keep me busy?” Dipper tried to stand, but Neil put a firm hand on his shoulder and pushed him down despite Dipper’s efforts. “She’s not telling him embarrassing stories again, is she?”

“Relax,” Neil said. “You’re among friends here. I doubt you’ve got any deep secrets that are going to make us hate you. Unless you actually are a wizard and didn’t tell us.”

“I raised the dead once, but that was mostly by accident.”

Neil laughed. “Join the club. I don’t suppose yours were just tragically misunderstood, were they?”

“No. They were not. I can’t remember if they successfully ate anyone, but they did bite Soos.”

Neil nodded, looking a little thoughtful. “Was it dangerous?”

“...Yeah.”

“Mabel said you’ve been in a lot of bad scrapes.”

Dipper shrugged. “I guess. I never really think about that when I’m in the middle of it.”

Neil gave Dipper a weak smile. “Then can you promise me something? Try to keep Norman safe. He’s...not very good at doing it himself.”

“It sounds like there’s a story there.”

“There’s a lot of stories there. He likes running off by himself, and he wants to solve everyone’s problems.” Neil dropped his head down to the surface of the table. “He’s a great guy, just not so careful.”

Dipper chuckled, feeling a worm of guilt in his stomach. “I’m not all that careful myself.” Because Neil was trying to get Dipper to help keep Norman safe, he decided to swallow his pride and admit just how bad he’d be at it. “I let myself get possessed by a demon, once. I raised the dead. I got trapped in a lab with a shapeshifting monster. I brought a video game character to life and nearly had him kill a guy I didn’t like. I used time travel to try to get a girl to like me and nearly destroyed the timestream.”

“Whoa. Whoa.” Neil spread his hands, placating, at Dipper. “We all make mistakes. Like the time I dropped my mom’s necklace in the toilet and flushed and tried to replace it with macaroni-” He stopped and took a deep breath. “Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that it’s not the worst thing in the world to make mistakes. But...well, you’re still here, so you must be doing something right. And Mabel says you’re good to have her back, so…” His brown eyes went wide and pleading. “Will you?”

“I’m not going to let Norman get himself killed, so sure. Urk!” Dipper yelped as Neil grabbed him around the middle.

“Thank you, dude! If we’ve both got Norman’s back, I’m sure he’ll be okay.”

“Heh, yeah.”

"Now, tell me about this Summerween."

"What's to say? Everyone buys up all the candy in town, kids roam around until the dead of night collecting candy, and The Trickster threatens to eat anyone who doesn't get into the right spirit."

Neil's eyes narrowed. "I'm too old for that little baby Boogeyman thing."

"This place is weird enough without me making stuff up," Dipper protested. "It nearly ate me and Mabel last year."

"Yeah, which is why we're getting out there early this year! I'm not relying on Grunkle Stan for my candy this time!"

"But what about the talent show?"

Mabel gave Grenda a devious grin, rubbing her hands together. "I've got that worked out, too. I'm going to be the Queen of Summerween this year, even if Pacifica buys the judges, the auditorium, or the whole town!" She erupted into maniacal laughter Dipper was pretty sure a sign she hadn't been getting enough sleep.

He shrugged at Neil. "It's next Friday, if you're all still here. Trick or treating, a big talent show, and tons of parties, right Wendy?"

Wendy winked at Dipper. "Yeah. I know a couple going down when everyone's going to be watching six-year-olds trip in tutus. If you're still around, I can show you the rounds." She offered Courtney an almost full smile.

Courtney, for her part, looked thrilled. "We were going to leave that Saturday anyway, but that'll be a great way to wrap up this miserable road trip.” She abruptly glanced at Mitch, biting her lip. “Of course, you’d have to keep an eye on the kids-”

“You know me, not the party type.” Mitch patted her on the shoulder.

“DIPPER!” Mabel sprinted to the table and paused, panting as she grinned up at Dipper. “Norman agreed to be in my Summerween play!”

“I was in a play once. I was a tree.” Neil’s contented smile faded suddenly. “It didn’t go so well for Norman.”

“What? Does he have stage fright?”

“No, he...got a little worked up about curses and fires and stuff. He sort of freaked out on stage. But I’m sure it’ll be okay!”

Mabel grinned triumphantly at Dipper before grabbing Neil’s hands. “I could make a part for a tree, too.”

“You could?” If Mabel hadn’t won over Neil before now, she apparently had, as his eyes widened and shimmered almost comically at her suggestion.

“You could?” Dipper echoed. “It’s a murder mystery.”

“They all questioned my genius,” Mabel muttered. But then she patted Dipper on the shoulder. “Don’t worry about it. Rehearsal starts at seven. Now chop chop, girls, we’ve got revisions to make!”

Mabel sprinted toward the golf cart, trailed by her pig and followers. Norman dropped down next to Dipper, bemused.

“So now what?”

“You heard her; rehearsal’s at seven.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE IS ALWAYS A STORM ON THE HORIZON


	5. Chapter 5

The next few days were hectic in a way Norman’s summer hadn’t been before. He’d gotten used to tense investigations, time spent poring through libraries, and the bone-chilling moment a ghost decided to turn on him. Between rehearsals, meals, getting pulled into helping Dipper at the Mystery Shack, and an epic water balloon fight that ended only when Stan showed up with some sort of Super Soaker equivalent of a war machine, Norman let his original purpose slip through his fingers.

He wondered, as he stared at the ceiling of the motel Saturday night, a week before he was going home, if that might be for the best. The Duskertons had warned him away from delving too deeply into Gravity Falls, and the graveyard had creeped him out majorly. His specialty was ghosts, and he’d yet to see one outside of the Duskertons’ convenience store.

So maybe two weeks of hanging out with other kids, giving Neil and Courtney and Mitch a chance to set back and relax without dealing with Norman’s shenanigans, was a good idea.

The moment he made the decision, it seemed, a knock came at the door. “Psst. Norman!”

Everyone else was a deep enough sleeper that they didn’t rouse, but Norman was already up, so padded to the door and cracked it open. It was Dipper, dressed in his usual vest and T-shirt (Norman had yet to sneak into Dipper’s dresser to determine if he had any other clothes), bouncing on his feet.

“Norman, you gotta come with me.” He grabbed Norman’s wrist and dragged him out of the room; too late, Norman lunged at the door as it swung closed. Dipper was still tugging at him, but Norman turned, holding his ground.

“Dipper, it’s three in the morning. I am in my pajamas, and you’ve locked me out of my hotel room.”

Dipper stopped tugging at Norman and looked him up and down. Norman crossed his arms, as until he’d called attention to it, he’d forgotten he was in flimsy sleep pants and a T-shirt with Caspar on it. His feet were cold. Dipper’s smile faded, and he gnawed at his bottom lip.

“Sorry?”

“Forget about it; I don’t think you could wake them up if you tried. You might as well show me what you wanted to...and get me some shoes or something.” He wiggled his toes.

Dipper ducked his head. “Sorry. I just really wanted to talk to someone and Mabel’s - well, she needs her rest. Here.” He tossed Norman his vest and turned to head down to the parking lot. Norman caught the vest automatically. It smelled a little sweaty and smoky, with an overtone of pine. He slipped in on because it was better than nothing.

“I think there’s a pair of sandals in the cart,” Dipper called behind him. “Try not to step on any broken glass on your way down.”

Norman followed, shoving his hands into the pockets of the vest to keep warm; his hand bumped into something in a pocket, so he tugged it out, intending to toss it to Dipper. When it turned out to be a tampon, he stuffed it back in.

“So why do you have a tampon in your pocket?”

Dipper, rooting through the back of the golf cart, triumphantly extracted a pair of size 12 flip flops and tossed them to Norman.

“Have a twin sister going through puberty and then ask me that.” Dipper smirked at Norman and took a seat in the driver’s side of the cart. “I figure every month we can avoid a Carrie-style meltdown in the locker room is a good month.”

“Does Mabel have telekinetic powers?”

“What? No, like the beginning of the movie. Mabel bled all over her skirt once and I’ve been carrying these ever since.”

Norman heard the echo of Mrs. Duskerton’s assessment in that response; he must have been smiling or something because Dipper’s face abruptly scrunched up. “What? It’s Mabel; I’m not going to let her get all teary just because neither of us was properly prepared.”

Norman shook his head. “It’s nothing. You just _are_ a nice boy.”

Dipper scowled as Norman sat next to him. “You keep saying that. What do you mean by that?”

Norman braced himself as Dipper took off, presumably heading back toward the Mystery Shack. “You have to promise not to be mad.”

Dipper turned, raising one eyebrow at Norman. He was almost frowning. “Okay, now you need to tell me.”

Well, if Dipper was going to be mad, he’d be mad. “Before we met, like actually met and talked, I went over to the Dusk and Dawn. Mrs. Duskerton said I should talk to you. She, uh, showed me some security footage.”

“Security…” Norman could see the moment Dipper realized what Norman had seen. “You saw...you can’t tell anyone!” He swung around in his seat, nearly sending the cart careening into a ditch. Once he’d righted the cart, he took a deep breath, steadying his hands on the wheel. “I’m serious, Norman.”

“I haven’t told anyone. Just, every time you do something nice like that, I remember Mrs. Duskerton saying you’re a nice kid. You know, because you are.”

“I…” Dipper’s gaze was fixed on the road, and Norman could see a flush gathering at the bottom of his neck. “It’s just embarrassing.”

“It’s not embarrassing.” At Dipper’s furious glare, Norman held up his hand to cut him off. “Fine. The lamb costume is embarrassing. I probably will never understand why or how you picked that up. But you care about people. That’s nothing to be ashamed about. I think it’s cool.”

“Yeah well that’s great we’re here.” Dipper slammed on the brakes and bolted out of the cart, leaving Norman to clamber out on his own. Dipper was striding away from the cart at high speed; Norman, being several inches taller, caught up with him just as Dipper stopped at the edge of a six-foot hole in the ground. Actually, as Norman bent to look at it, he saw that the hole sank into a murky puddle of water and extended beyond the limit of his vision.

“Dipper? Are you okay? Why are we looking at a hole?”

“I’m fine!” Dipper’s voice squeaked on the end of the reply, and Norman could see his fists clenched.

“Dipper?”

“Just forget it. Look at this!” Dipper waved at the hole.

“It’s a hole.”

“It’s a land-shark,” Dipper said.

“It’s a hole,” Norman repeated.

“Well, obviously it’s not a land-shark. But I saw this thing rear out of the ground from my window, and it’s clearly a danger to everyone.”

“It’s a hole.”

Dipper sighed. “Norman. You’re going to need to accept that things happen here that aren’t easy to explain until you see them for yourself.”

“And the land-shark is one of them.”

“It reared up out of the ground like a - a shark, and it could be hunting anywhere!”

“And this warranted waking me up at 3 because?”

Dipper dropped his hands, which he’d been waving wildly to emphasize the dire circumstances. “I guess it didn’t,” he said. “Um, I can just lend you my bed and bring you back to the motel when someone will be up.” He hugged his arms around himself, suddenly averse to looking at Norman.

Norman wanted to hit himself. He’d never seen anyone close up so fast, and in retrospect, he should have known better. Dipper had shown up at three in the morning looking for Norman. Dipper had dragged Norman halfway across town to look at a hole. Admittedly, a hole he thought had been made by a land-shark, whatever that was.

But he’d sought out Norman with something that excited him and Norman had brushed him off.

“Sorry. I’m a little cranky. I usually run into three in the morning from the other side of the evening.” Norman smiled apologetically at Dipper. “Maybe get me somewhere warm and give me some caffeine, and you can start from the beginning?”

“S - sure!” Dipper hopped into motion, and Norman trailed him back to the Mystery Shack, and the kitchen where Dipper shakily handed Norman a can of soda. Norman took a sip, watching Dipper as he shifted anxiously, all but pacing around the kitchen.

He needed to run damage control, and for some reason, the thought of that was more daunting than facing down a vengeful witch’s ghost in the heart of her own domain.

“Do you want to talk down here, or can we check out your room?”

“Ack.” Dipper dropped the can he’d been holding, which clattered to the floor and made him freeze halfway toward reaching down to catch it. He looked up at Norman, his eyes wide, almost panicked. “I-”

Norman bent to grab the can, and only ended up hitting his head against Dipper’s when the other boy lunged for it. Norman fell back, rubbing his head. When he looked up, Dipper had retreated to the refrigerator, had his head against it, and was hitting it rhythmically. “Stupid, stupid, stupid.”

Norman straightened and stepped up behind Dipper. He cautiously reached out; Dipper tensed but thankfully didn’t hit Norman or anything when he touched Dipper’s shoulder.

“Hey, you okay?”

Dipper shook himself, and when he turned back to Norman, he was smiling, albeit weakly.

“I’m fine. I just feel like I’ve been cursed or something. Is there a curse that makes you feel like you’re trapped in a body two sizes too small and everything you say comes out in moron?”

Norman didn’t mean to laugh. He knew it wasn’t going to help anything, but it just slipped out. At Dipper’s outraged glare, Norman shook his head. “Dipper. The word you’re looking for is puberty.”

Dipper stalked forward and grabbed Norman by the vest and shook him. “Then why am I still the same size?”

Norman couldn’t take this seriously, but he’d upset Dipper enough that he fought to keep himself under control. “Give it time. Look, we’re all in the throes of our hormones wreaking havoc with our bodies and minds. Nothing is going to make sense for, if Courtney’s any sign, five to ten years.”

Dipper sighed and let his head fall forward, hitting Norman’s chest. “Longer. Have you met Mabel?”

Norman didn’t try to conceal this chuckle. He let Dipper rest there, aware that whatever Dipper had seen outside, he’d needed someone to vent to, to offer a little comfort. About a minute passed in relative silence before Dipper began shifting uncomfortably. Norman stepped back, and Dipper lifted his head. His eyes looked a little damp, and his cheeks were flushed, but he looked a lot less unstable than a few minutes ago.

Dipper sniffed and wiped at his face. “This is so embarrassing.”

“Nah. It’d be worse if you walked around trying to look like a tough guy. It’s nice to know you trust me.”

“Alright, that sounds like my cue.” Dipper grabbed Norman’s arm and dragged him along as he headed for the stairs. “I’m gonna show you something you can’t talk to anyone else about.”

“Is it your name?” Norman asked.

Dipper snorted. “It’s not like I could possibly embarrass myself more in front of you.”

“Is that a yes?”

“It’s not what I was planning. I told you I saw a land-shark, and that means I’ve got to show you...the book.”

He swung open the door to his room; two empty beds sat on opposite ends of the room, which was strewn with toys, clothes, and the other miscellany expected in a teen’s room. “Mabel’s at a sleepover at Grenda’s, so we don’t need to be too quiet.”

That certainly explained why Dipper had driven to the motel for someone to talk to - or one reason, at least. 

Dipper had moved on to a desk, digging through a low drawer before turning and presenting a large leatherbound book marked with a six-fingered hand. He kicked his shoes off and sat on his bed before gesturing for Norman to join him.

The bed was narrow, but long enough that Norman could comfortably sit next to Norman with the book laid out before them.

“This,” Dipper said, “is the notebook I found last summer. It’s written by this person who was investigating all the weird stuff in Gravity Falls. He’s got all sorts of notes about the stuff he found.” He opened the book to a page detailing the unnamed author’s decision to hide the book to avoid some mysterious antagonist, and the admonition to ‘Trust No One’.

Dipper turned the page, revealing acid-green words written over the black ones.

‘GET OUT OF HERE NOW.’ Norman’s heart began to race. Dipper made to turn the page, but Norman grabbed his hand and looked at the other open page, where more green words glowed, the same as those written on the tomb, visible only to a medium.

‘YOU CAN’T TRUST THE PERSON WITH THIS JOURNAL. GET OUT BEFORE YOU’RE IN TOO DEEP.’

“Norman? Are you okay?” Dipper’s voice sounded distant and muted. He thought he might have shaken his head, but he wasn’t sure at all if he was okay. The note was obviously wrong, but the warning had come unexpectedly, and another sign that someone in the town knew about mediums, and had made an effort to reach out to them.

More importantly, it was a sign someone thought he was in danger.

“I’m...I’m fine. Go on. Tell me about land-sharks.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DON’T TRUST EVERYTHING YOU READ IN BOOKS.


	6. Chapter 6

“The land-shark, or bunyip, dwells in watery areas, preferring underground rivers and pools. It is an ambush predator, lunging out of water to seize prey. Their name comes from their tendency to attack targets on the surface from underground bodies of water, forming a distinctive sinkhole.”

“And that’s what you saw?”

“I saw a big old thing dig out of the ground. It wandered out toward the town.”

“Hm.” Norman flipped idly back and forth from the page Dipper had opened the journal to. He stopped, however, when he found another page with writing meant only for mediums. There was a drawing of a triangle with arms and legs, labeled ‘Bill Cipher’. ‘NOTHING DEAD LEAVES HERE,’ read the words scrawled over its form.

“What are you - nope.” Dipper slammed the book closed. “We are done with the journal for now.”

“What? Why?”

Dipper’s gaze was hard, serious. “Because Bill Cipher is bad news. I probably shouldn’t have let you even see that. He’s - I don’t know. Like that weird chick at the end of Ghostbusters.”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” But Norman wasn’t entirely sure Dipper was right. Dipper only knew what was written in the book in words he could see. Norman could see that Bill Cipher was tied up with the lack of spirits in Gravity Falls, and that meant it was possible he could offer some help to solving the mystery.

Addressing that now wasn’t going to help, though, so Norman let Dipper opine on what to do about the land-shark, up until the moment the phone downstairs rang, and Norman realized the sun had come up.

“Dipper! Is your little friend over here?”

Dipper winced at his Grunkle Stan’s shout. He glanced at the window and gave Norman a weak grin. “I guess we lost track of time.”

“Dipper, I gotta know if you’ve kidnapped the little kid with his hair standing straight up so I know how bad I got to lie to his sister.” Dipper’s uncle appeared in the door, dressed in his undershirt and striped boxers. He scowled at the sight of the two boys sitting on Dipper’s bed. “Okay, is this a consensual thing, or do we gotta call my lawyer?”

“Sorry about this, Grunkle Stan-”

“I knew Mabel was out of the house and Dipper’d be lonely, so I sort of snuck out without telling anyone.” Norman gave Mr. Pines his most guileless smile.

The man stared at his, narrow-eyed, for a long moment. “You got a good poker face, kid. I like that. I’ll tell your sister there was an impromptu sleepover and I’ll have you back in one piece. You _are_ in one piece, right?” Norman waggled his fingers at Mr. Pines to show off his un-maimed self. “Good. Breakfast’s in ten minutes.”

Once Mr. Pines was out of earshot, Norman patted Dipper’s shoulder. “Sorry, I tried.”

“That’s okay,” Dipper said. “Grunkle Stan doesn’t mind what’s going on up here as long as it doesn’t cause property damage or require him to get legal help. I think he actually respects you more because you tried to lie to him.” He brushed off Norman’s questioning look. “I know he’s weird. You just roll with it. You want breakfast?”

“Please.”

Norman was returned to his sister after breakfast to find clothing and get chewed out by Courtney for vanishing without telling anyone. Because she was in charge of this little expedition, Courtney took it upon her to ground Norman until Monday. He took the punishment without complaint because trying to explain would expose Dipper’s role in his disappearance.

The moment Courtney went outside to sun, the hotel phone rang.

“I’m so sorry about all this. Did I get you in too much trouble? Are you going home early?”

“I’m not allowed to leave the hotel room today,” Norman said. “Or have anyone over.” He flopped back onto his bed. “I’ll be fine. There’s some dumb kids’ show on public access - Candle Cove?”

“Turn off the TV,” Dipper said. “Forget you ever saw anything.”

“What?”

“Just trust me. This is one of those Gravity Falls things that you just want to walk away from.”

Norman hit the remote, shutting off the television. “There. No more creepy children’s TV. But I expect something out of this, Pines.”

“I could sneak in and keep you company.” Norman smiled at the thought of Dipper rappelling from the roof to hang out with him.

“Nah, no use risking another day of imprisonment. I think I’m up for more time in solitary just talking to you.”

“Only if anyone finds out, and I’m not going to tell anyone. You’re not going to turn yourself in, are you?”

“Nah.”

“Then it’s our little secret.” Norman felt a little jolt in his stomach at the thought of the two of them having a secret together. “You know, until I get around to showing you my school ID and you can mock me for my embarrassing name.”

Norman chuckled. “But all sorts of people know that. It’s not nearly as special.”

“I don’t have to tell you,” Dipper retorted.

“I want to hear it. Why can’t you say it over the phone?”

“Names have power, Norman. You say it out loud, and who knows what could happen.”

“I missed the part where you were an extraplanar entity of unimaginable power,” Norman replied.

“Yeah, laugh it up. But mark my words: one day my paranoia’s going to pay off.”

Norman chuckled, even though there was tension in his chest, the reminder that in Gravity Falls paranoia could be well-founded. “Well, you and Mabel can get started on your bunyip hunt without me.”

“I suppose.” Dipper sounded dubious.

“What? Don’t you two do this sort of thing all the time?”

“Yeah…”

“Well, go on. Courtney will be springing me tomorrow and I can join you. Just don’t get eaten while I’m not there to watch your back.”

“Sure.” Dipper didn’t hang up, and Norman found him reluctant to be the one to end the conversation.

“So, um…”

“Do you think Courtney will let you out for rehearsal? Mabel’s going to be bummed if you can’t show up.”

“I don’t know. I’ll check, but there’ll be a better chance if she doesn’t catch me violating my parole. I’ll call you later, okay?”

Dipper sighed. “Sure.”

Norman hung up the phone and sat back up. With nothing but an empty hotel room to entertain himself, Norman decided to write a few pages in his own journal. It was perhaps less panicked than the journal Dipper possessed, but it was turning into a very thorough dissertation on the nature and habits of ghosts.

Admittedly, it wasn’t one he was going to share with anyone without heavy editing, because it was also his personal journal. So after Norman wrote a few words about the strange ectoplasmic writing only he could see, he meandered a bit about the few days which meant it talked a lot about Dipper.

Dipper, who was very nice, who had brown eyes that, like his sister’s, had a remarkable range of emotion, from the wide-eyed puppy eyes to the narrow-eyed concentration he got when studying something. Dipper, who had latched onto Norman and easily fit into Norman’s routine. Dipper, who was...well…

Norman’s pen paused, because he had no idea how to continue. Dipper was spastic and nervous and...and…

He angrily scribbled across the page and slammed the journal closed. He didn’t need to be writing about Dipper. He…

He spent the rest of the day staring at the ceiling, only moving when he heard the key in the lock, and that only to grab his journal before anyone could come in. Courtney was resplendent, tanned in her dark pink one-piece and sunglasses. She looked the room over and sighed. “I leave you here all day and you didn’t even get that little weird kid to sneak in here.”

“You said I was grounded. You told me I couldn’t have anyone over. Dipper and Mabel are hunting bunyips.”

Neil ran into the back of Courtney’s legs running back into the room. “Norman! Are you done being punished yet? Mabel told me to go to rehearsal early and eat with them.”

“Neil, hush.” Courtney stepped up to Norman’s bed and tapped his head. “Norman, you are a good kid - almost annoyingly so. You have, I think, been properly punished. Why don’t you get out of our hair and go rehearse your little play thing? Wendy’s promised to show me all the sights of Gravity Falls, so I’ll be home early.”

“Really?”

Courtney rolled her eyes. “Yes. Come on, Mitch is driving us. I think he and Soos are going to play touch football or something.”

Norman gratefully joined them in the car, and when they reached the Mystery Shack, briefly basked in the amazed look he got from Dipper when they arrived before he was tackled by both a pig and teenaged girl, the latter howling, “You’re out! Great! I did some revision for your part!”

The bunyip hunt had not gone well. They had found three more sinkholes and evidence that the bunyip had eaten someone’s corgi, but had seen no bunyip. Rehearsal was slightly better; Norman had gained substantial respect for Mabel’s budding talents as a writer. She was all over the place, but she had apparently gotten all the imagination slotted for her and her twin, in the same way Dipper seemed to have gotten all the focus.

Dipper dragged Norman away before they left back to the hotel; ducking behind the Shack, he handed Norman a small plastic card.

“What, did you laminate a business card or…Oh.”

“Yeah.” Dipper was looking at the sky.

“They named your sister Mabel, and they gave you...this?”

“It was my great-great-grandfather’s name.”

“Did they hate him? For that matter, did your parents hate you?”

Dipper shrugged. “It’s tradition.”

Norman shook his head and handed the card back to Dipper. “Well, that one’s staying in the vault.”

Dipper’s smile was almost pathetically grateful; it made Norman’s stomach twist, and he almost did something stupid. Instead, he grinned at Dipper.

“All the better to keep your enemies from getting leverage on you, right?”

Dipper’s smile turned shy. “Yeah. Thanks.” Norman turned to leave. “You’re coming by tomorrow, right? To hunt for the land-shark?”

“Of course.”

Neil suddenly appeared from around the edge of the Shack. “Hey, we’re going to be late. And Dipper? I was trying to remember where I heard of land-sharks before. They’re from Dungeons and Dragons, and I remember them because they’re these weird things that eat halflings, you know, little people like gnomes-”

A manic grin appeared on Dipper’s face; Norman felt the odd urge to back away, or flee, or something.

“Gnomes. Yeah, we’ll see you tomorrow, Norman. We’ve got big plans to make. Mabel, guess what we’re feeding the gnomes to!”

Despite Dipper’s worrying declaration, the next few days were as absent of land-sharks as the previous ones had did. Dipper’s realization that land-sharks liked bite-sized meals was apparently shared by the forest gnomes, which meant they were as scarce as the monster.

And then on Wednesday they had a break when they were passing the animal shelter and the ground began to shake. What erupted from the ground looked not a lot like the thing from Dungeons and Dragons, but more like...an aquatic wolf or lion or something, twice the size of either and hoping the shelter was a brick-wrapped pot pie.

In the end, the hero of the day was Neil, who teamed up with Waddles in an impressive display of bravery in the defense of the animals. Once they’d collapsed a statue of Nathaniel Northwest on the land-shark, there was a heated debate about how to deal with it, one decided when Neil had suggested they stick in on a train to the Seattle Zoo and let it be their problem.

Mabel declared a holiday from rehearsal, and everyone ended up partying at the Mystery Shack. Norman hung on the edges, watching Neil demonstrate a heretofore unseen skill with ballroom dancing, leading a laughing Mabel in circles around the gift shop floor. He saw Dipper chatting with Wendy, who was laughing at something he said, rubbing the top of his head, and Norman saw such a fondness in both their expressions-

He didn’t mean to end up in Dipper’s room, rooting around in his desk. It just happened, and once he held the journal in his hands, he had to open it.

There was the first admonition: ‘GET OUT OF HERE NOW. YOU CAN’T TRUST THE PERSON WITH THIS JOURNAL. GET OUT BEFORE YOU’RE TOO DEEP.’

“Too late,” Norman muttered. The next page was blank, but then the messages made out to mediums became more frequent.

‘THIS PLACE IS NO PLACE FOR YOU. THE RESTLESS DEAD CANNOT LEAVE, CANNOT BE PACIFIED. NOTHING DEAD LEAVES HERE, GUARDED BY A WATCHFUL EYE. THE TOMB OF THE SELECTED MAN WHOSE VICTORY REMAINS UNSUNG HOLDS THE WELL OF SOULS. THE PRICE OF KNOWLEDGE IS TOO HIGH.’

Norman closed the book. He didn’t...he felt guilty opening the book against Dipper’s instructions. The words in the book worried him, the admonition against interfering warring against his desire to help whatever souls must have been trapped in Gravity Falls.

Nothing dead leaves here…

He had to help. He had to figure out where the Well of Souls was and try to find a way to help. He had to do it without letting Dipper know he’d opened the journal again.

Norman sighed. He carefully hid the book back in its drawer and snuck back out of Dipper’s room; thankfully, no one seemed to have noticed his absence, which was a small blessing.

He scanned his options, and decided that Mabel was his best bet for pumping someone for information. She was taking a break from dancing, sitting with her girlfriends and waving her arms wildly. Norman strided confidently to them and leaned back against a display case. “Hey.”

“Oh, hey!” Mabel leapt to her feet. “I keep meaning to ask you because Dipper is stupid and is going to forget but I wanted to get your address and maybe your phone number so that when you go home Dipper doesn’t mope around like when I thought I’d lost my chance to see Waddles ever again.”

Norman’s stomach twisted uneasily. “That’s...he wouldn’t miss me the way you would Waddles.”

Grenda giggled and Candy hid a smile. “Oh, Norman. One day, you’ll look back on this conversation and realize that, like always, I was right. Anyway…?”

“Right. Here.” Norman scribbled his address and number on a...receipt from yesterday’s breakfast and handed it to Mabel.

“Now I think you had a reason to come over here. Girls, give us five. See if you can find Waddles; I think he’s passed out by the candy.” Once Candy and Grenda stepped out of earshot, Mabel bestowed Norman with a beatific smile. “So. How can I help you, Norman?”

“I wanted to know something. I ran across this weird riddle. It was talking about some ‘selected man whose victory remains unsung’-”

“President Trembley!”

“President of what?”

Mabel gave the room a sidelong look and then dragged Norman through the “Employees Only” door. Once it was closed, she dragged him close.

“The eighth-and-a-halfth President of the United States! He founded Gravity Falls, but they wiped his name out of the history books because he was too weird.”

Norman opened his mouth, planning to protest, but then he paused, closed his mouth. Gravity Falls was weird. Norman knew the world was weirder than most people thought. Discovering a secret president didn’t seem all out of place.

“Okay. Wait. Quentin Trembley?”

“Yeah! You heard of him?”

“Yeah, I gotta go, Mabel. Um, tell Dipper I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”

“O...kay.” Mabel’s eyebrows knit together. “You didn’t have a fight, did you?”

“I just have something I need to take care of. Really. Have a good party!”

Norman had grown much more familiar with the layout of Gravity Falls in the past week, so finding his way to the graveyard, even at night, was relatively easy. It took him a little longer to find the tombstone of Quentin Trembley, even with the words written in ectoplasmic paint. When he reached it, Norman paused, staring at the tombstone. He didn’t know how to proceed. He didn’t feel comfortable doing this on his own, but admitting to anyone he’d looked in the book was…

He had to do this on his own.

Gingerly, Norman reached out and pressed the triangular sigil on the top of the tombstone. With a bone-shaking rumble, the ground underneath the tombstone fell away, revealing worn stone steps plunging underneath the graveyard.

“Well, this is promising.”

Norman proceeded down the stairs, the stairwell enveloping him with blinding darkness. After about a minute, however, he saw a faint light. Further along, he found glowing green palmprints scattered across the walls. He traced his hand along a few, finding the texture the same as the rough stone. Norman followed the stairs, lit by the ectoplasm, down until he was certain he had to be a mile or further down, and at last hit a stone door covered in strange runes. At the very center of it was a carving of a…

Norman felt the world spin around him; he reached out to the door to keep his balanced, his hand resting on the faceted blue eye of the door’s center. It seemed like so much of a coincidence he couldn’t breathe. He had to…

The door shifted under his hand; Norman almost fell forward, but caught himself at the last moment. Inside the room was…

The room’s interior was gleaming and glowing, suffused with green light. It was almost impossible to see any details from within, except the glowing white eye at the far end, and the shape of an altar beneath it.

Norman stepped inside. He was halfway through the room when the door slammed closed behind him. He stopped mid-step, turning.

He should have brought backup. But he was hip-deep in it now. Norman kept walking toward the altar, slow steps that felt weighty. And around him, the green glow slowly resolved into individual shapes. To his right was the form of a man, dressed in clothing reminiscent of some earlier centuries. To his left a woman in a flapper skirt and a bob.

Norman reached the altar and the gleaming white eye. Facets in the shape seemed to be edged in green, and looking at it, Norman could feel something muting his perception.

“Boy, kid, you picked the wrong place to get lost in.” The world went strangely grey and the eye blinked at him. A yellow triangle faded into view, framing the eyeball. It wore a top hat, a bow tie, and had indistinct hands and feet.

“Bill...Cipher?”

“Ha, that’s why I like you, kid. You don’t need every little thing explained to you. Like for instance, I bet you know what’s going on down here.”

“You came down here to interfere with the spirits of the dead.”

Bill’s eye narrowed. “Not quite, Eyeball. And here I had high hopes for you. But enough pleasantries. Let’s get down to business. Pull up a ghost.”

Norman glanced behind him, seeing the ghosts frozen in time, unmoving outside whatever weird bubble he and Bill inhabited.

“I think I’m fine.”

“Well, whatever.” Bill sank to the altar and sat, legs crossed. “You came down here to free all the ghosts trapped down here, right?”

“How do you know that?”

Bill’s eye glowed red as the rest of his form flickered through a thousand images, moments from Norman’s life. “Because I see EVERYTHING, Eyeball. So, let’s talk history, plans.”

“What happened down here?”

Bill waved his right hand vaguely. “Quentin Trembley’s best friend was like you, Eyeball. He got a little crazy near the end - who knows why - and decided that the ghosts of Gravity Falls shouldn’t be wandering free. So he built this place in Trembley’s grave.”

“This is wrong,” Norman said softly.

“Oh, I know. Terrible.”

“And you said you could help get them out of here?”

“Yeah, with a little help from you,” Bill said.

Remembering the admonitions of the journal, Norman knew he couldn’t just agree to something. “What do you want out of it?”

“Like I said, I just need you to give me a little help, and I’ll get these ghosts out of here.”

Norman looked into Bill Cipher’s eye, the single wide eye that met his with adamant focus. He nodded. “Alright. What do I need to do?”

“Oh, don’t worry. I’ll be doing all the real work.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE AND IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN.


	7. Chapter 7

“Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Well, if you’re sure!” Mabel leapt onto Dipper’s bed, sending the sheets flying and throwing him into active consciousness. Perched above him, Mabel grinned at him wildly. “Hey, bro. Guess what day it is?”

“Thursday?”

“No, it’s Summerween Eve! We’re almost ready for the talent show, and - oh, Norman said he’s going to be out and about today, so we’re going to have to fend without him.”

“What? But he’s leaving Saturday!”

Mabel rolled her eyes as Dipper struggled out from under her, knocking the sheets aside and scrambled for his dresser. “Oh, my gosh. Stop being so dramatic, Dipper. I bet you don’t even know-”

“I need to concentrate here, Mabel. Did I do something to offend him? Did I do something that weirded him out? Did he get bored of me? Am I just a summer fling?”

Mabel had clambered back onto Dipper’s bed and was laughing at him. He glowered at her, but she didn’t seem to notice. Dipper, therefore, returned to his desperate attempts to get dressed and make a plan. Once he had pants on he paused, recalling something that had filtered through his sleep haze. “Wait. Did you talk to him?”

“Yeah, Dipper.” Mabel flopped back onto Dipper’s bed, folding her hands under her head. “And maybe if you’re nice to me, I’ll tell you what he said. Also, phrasing.”

“What?”

Smirking, Mabel just shook her head. “Never mind.”

Dipper’s mind was actually skipping tracks. He couldn’t focus. He ran his hand through his hair, wondering where he’d left his hat. Okay. He’d apparently driven away the best friend he’d made in years, the guy who was leaving in less than two days after which Dipper would never see him.

“Okay, I can’t stand watching this.” Mabel swung herself onto the floor and stopped Dipper’s movement with a forceful palm to the chest. He glowered at her. “Dipper. I need you to listen to me. I just spoke to Norman. He told me he was running around prepare a surprise for us - you.”

“What.”

“He’s not ignoring you, Dipper. Come on; he really likes you. I bet he’s worrying if you’re going to keep in touch or whatever. So he’s running out there doing something nice for you.”

“What?”

Mabel sighed. “Just chill. Go work in the gift shop. We’re doing a dress rehearsal right after dinner.”

Dipper opened his mouth to argue, and Mabel pressed her fingers against his lips. “Boop.”

“But Mabel-”

“Boop.”

“But-”

“Boop.”

“Bu-”

“BOOP. You are going to go have breakfast and go work in the gift shop and you are not going to pace around worrying about whether or not Norman is going to pour a bucket of pig’s blood over your head.”

“Oink!”

“And that’s why I said you couldn’t watch Carrie,” Mabel said to Waddles. She rested a calming head on her pig’s head. “Look, Dipper. I do not believe I am exaggerating when I say I think you might have found your Waddles.”

“Wait what?” Dipper’s heart skipped a beat. “What do you mean by that?”

“I mean the day Norman showed up in Gravity Falls, a little piece of your destiny slid into place. Come on, a ghost-buster-”

“Ghost whisperer,” Dipper insisted. “He doesn’t like fighting.”

“Anyway. You cannot tell me that a ghost whisperer who shows up in Gravity Falls is not fate, kismet, destiny. Watching the two of you talk is like watching Sherlock and Watson, Sapphire and Steel, Mulder and Scully.”

“Am I David Duchovny or-”

“Not the point!” Mabel waved her hand dismissively. “Dipper, do you remember how every timeline but one ended with me adopting Waddles?”

Dipper nodded quickly, hoping Mabel would gloss over how every timeline but one ended with Wendy dating Robbie; he might have gotten over Wendy herself, but it was still a stressful memory. “Wait. How many times did we live through that day? Do you think we might be a couple of months older than we really are?”

“Forget about that, Dipper. I am telling you that the fates conspired to have you two meet and nothing is going to break that partnership apart.”

Dipper tried to find something to say, something that didn’t sound too hopeful or too sappy or too...he didn’t know. Emotional. The best he got was a squeaked, “You think so?”

“Trust me, Dipper. This is a bromance for the ages.”

“Heh heh, yeah. Bromance.” Dipper excused himself and fled downstairs. He wolfed down a bowl of cereal and opened up the shop early, figuring that if he was trying to burn off excess energy, he might as well try to make Grunkle Stan a buck doing so.

Grunkle Stan poked his head out the Employees Only door several minutes after Dipper opened, scowling. “What’s going - Dipper. What are you doing up?”

Dipper shrugged. “Just thought I’d get an early start.”

“Not that I don’t appreciate the extra effort, but are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Where’s that wild-haired kid you’ve been hanging out with?”

“He’s leaving soon, back to who-knows-where.”

“Ah.” Grunkle Stan wandered over to the counter and ruffled Dipper’s hair. “Don’t worry about it, kid. Why don’t you...take the day...off?” The words fought to escape Grunkle Stan’s lips, but they came, nonetheless.

“No, thanks. I’ll be fine.”

“Well, you know best. Try not to think too much; it’s bad for you.”

“Thanks.”

The day moved too quickly and too slowly; Dipper would check the clock fifty times and not see the minute hand move, and then get wrapped up with a billion customers in a row and then find two hours had passed. Saturday loomed over Dipper, the knowledge that despite Mabel’s assurances, Norman was going somewhere a billion miles away.

He barely paid any attention to rehearsal, his lines all but automatic and reminded of Norman’s absence every time Mabel gestured at his empty space.

He was prepared to head to bed right after, but Neil grabbed his arm and pulled him aside.

“Dipper, did you and Norman...fight or something?”

Dipper shook his head. “Mabel said he told her he’s got some sort of surprise for us?”

“Hm.” Neil rubbed at his chin thoughtfully. “I guess that’s what he could be up to. I just...he’s been acting real weird. Well, out of character.”

“Since he got here?”

“Ha!” Neil chortled. “He’s been extra Norman-y ever since he got here. I meant since yesterday. Are you sure you didn’t fight?”

“I don’t remember anything.” The closest Dipper could think they’d gotten to a fight was the moment he’d seen Norman staring at the picture of Bill Cipher and he’d panicked. The thought of anyone else he knew messing around with that stupid triangle made him sick with worry. Maybe Norman had felt like Dipper was being controlling and had left?

Dipper slept uneasily, such that when Mabel woke him the next morning, he was lethargic and grumpy. As a result, he was tired and snappish by the time Mabel had them prepping their costumes, the most sickeningly adorable dog and cat costumes Mabel could create. If the Trickster had been threatening them this year, they would hit their quota in the first ten minutes.

By the time they were ready to leave, Dipper was certain Mabel was about to strangle him from pure frustration.

“Dipper, you are going to see Norman in like five minutes, and then you can wander off and, I don’t know, wait for the Great Pumpkin to your heart’s content. But if you look at the clock one more time, I’m going to put you on a leash.”

A knock came at the door, and Mabel stepped aside as Dipper rushed to it.

“Hey, Norman, this better be a great surprise because I missed seeing you-” Neil was standing alone on the porch in a mummy costume; Mitch was standing back near his car. “Where’s Norman?”

“He said he’d meet us at the talent show.” Neil tugged Dipper out the door and slightly aside from the door, leaning in close. “Look, Dipper, I’m worried about him, but when I tried asking him about it, he got all mean, like sarcastic and stuff.”

“Do you know where he is?”

Neil shook his head. “He keeps saying he’ll be at the talent show. So maybe you can talk to him then? See what’s going on?”

“Of course I will.” Dipper tried to offer a reassuring smile. “He’s my friend, too.”

“Okay, what’s going on out here? Are we ready to trick or treat or what?”

“Sure.” Dipper held out a hand to Mabel. “Let’s go.”

“Where’s Norman?”

“He’ll be joining us later. Let’s go.”

Mabel nodded, but she looked about as troubled as Dipper felt.

It was another tense Summerween; Dipper was beginning to think the holiday had something against him. He tried to keep up a happy face, receiving bags upon bags from every house, but he couldn’t get over his worry. He could see Mabel watching him, her own eyes worried, and he wished he had something he could tell her.

When the melons started going out, they raced back to the Mystery Shack to drop off their candy and then back out to the community center with their costumes and props. Mabel was practically vibrating, and Dipper realized she was probably consumed with anxiety about the show, leaving Norman to him.

Norman hadn’t shown up by the time the talent show started, and as a result, Mabel was the center of a small aura of anxious fury as she watched one act after another, with Norman still unaccounted for.

Pacifica and her band earned a standing ovation, and then it was time for them to start, with no sign of Norman, and Dipper could see the cracks in Mabel’s fury. She was probably going to start crying right here and-

“Hey. Am I late?”

“Just in time!” Mabel’s demeanor shifted lightning-fast when Norman appeared, ready in his costume and makeup. She grabbed him, leading him toward the stage while the others took their places.

There was no time to talk to Norman, because the curtain was rising and then they were smack-dab in the middle of the play.

It was funny and scary, and Dipper felt proud of Mabel. She’d actually done a good job with her sock puppet opera, and she’d only improved in the intervening year. He was actually pretty impressed with Norman, too. In rehearsal, Norman had been a little stilted and nervous, but here, he was charming and funny, drawing laughs as he showed off. It was bordering on creepy how easily Norman had stepped into the role of someone who was supposed to be legitimately unnerving and alien.

Maybe he didn’t know Norman as well as he thought.

Dipper caught Neil staring worriedly at Norman halfway through the show, and for all that something was clearly wrong with Norman, Dipper felt a wash of relief that this behavior was worrying to people who knew Norman better than him.

The show drew to its climax, when Mabel, the detective, would draw the cast together for the reveal of who the murderer was. Mabel had refused to allow them to rehearse this part, explaining that she wanted their shock at the real culprit to come as a shock to everyone.

The lights flashed on to dramatically frame the cast seated around the parlor. The audience gasped.

Dipper met Mabel’s eyes; she looked panicked, and he couldn’t understand until he looked down, and saw Neil sprawled across the stage, unmoving. He wasn’t sure if this was part of the play, or something worse, but he wasn’t going to let Mabel’s show get ruined. He just needed to find a graceful way to get Neil offstage and to a doctor.

“Sir Willow! Who could have possibly done this?”

“That would be me, Pine Tree.” Norman, dressed in the sleek white suit of Doctor Trigon, stood smoothly from his seat. He was grinning unnervingly, and Dipper realized in a moment of horror that Norman might not have been acting weird because he was upset with Dipper. He knew another reason a person in Gravity Falls might start acting unnerving and alien.

“Bill?” Mabel demanded.

Norman, or the dream demon wearing his body, turned to Mabel in a fluid motion, a smug, predatory grin on his lips. “Got it in one, Shooting Star.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE FOURTH WALL WILL NOT PROTECT YOU.


	8. Chapter 8

“I don’t know what you’re up to, Bill, but you’re not going to get away with it!” Dipper looked around for something, anything he could use to defend himself.

“Yeah, or did you forget that when you’re possessing someone, you have barely any powers?” Mabel jeered.

Bill’s smirk grew almost imperceptibly. “Ooh, not even a little right. I’ve always got my mental powers, Shooting Star. True, they’re not much good on you right now, because I’m possessing a body, but I’ve still got them. On the other hand, you think I don’t have any powers like this because I get the strengths and weaknesses of the form I inhabit, and Pine Tree over there doesn’t have any power to speak of.” He waved one hand; ghostly green mist curled from it before lancing out and chaining the exits closed. “Norman, on the other hand, is, how do I say this, special.”

Dipper’s heart sank. The one time they’d really beaten Bill Cipher, it had been in the mental realm, where people were as strong as they could imagine. Here, any powers Bill had would outclass them totally. His mood was hardly helped by the realization that Norman had possessed powers he’d never mentioned to Dipper. He’d shared things with Norman he didn’t let anyone else know, and Norman hadn’t seen fit to trust Dipper in return.

Bill stepped to the center of the stage and spread his hands. “And now that I’ve got a captive audience, I think it’s time for a story.”

“We wanna see how the play ends!”

Bill glanced at the heckler and snapped his fingers. The man’s form stretched and shredded into mist and a book - Agatha Christie’s The Mousetrap - fell into the seat. “If you’re big on spoilers, you can read that,” Bill said.

Dipper’s blood ran cold. He’d seen displays of power like that - in the real world - only from two entities. Ma and Pa Duskerton could do things like that. It wasn’t much of a stretch to think other ghosts might be able to do the same. He wasn’t crazy enough to think that just because Bill Cipher hadn’t shown off these sorts of talents before he couldn’t do them, but he had possessed Dipper in order to burn a book. And that suggested the weird, ghostly powers were Norman’s, not Bill’s.

“Any more interruptions? No? Good. Now, when Gravity Falls was first founded, there was a gentleman who lived here who had a very special talent. He could perceive the spirits of the dead, and, as it turns out, he could control them as well. This gentleman was a decent sort, as humans go, and he stumbled into a great dilemma when he discovered the existence of a demon who could possess people and could make use of their many talents once he did so. You see, this demon had very little influence on the material world, and ghosts had a great deal. 

“So while possessing a medium, this demon could finally gain a measure of control comparable to the power he wielded in his own realm. He would finally have enough power to do anything he wanted.

“But this gentleman came up with a plan. He decided to shield the ghosts of this town from the eyes of mediums, so that none would stay long enough to become a risk. He worked magic to lock the spirits of the dead in a cavern beneath the town, and left warnings to drive mediums away from this place. And then one day a child saw the warnings and heard about the demon and didn’t know to leave well enough alone.

“And as a result, here I am, Bill Cipher, master of the mind and now master of the dead!” Green shades rose from the floor, and shackles snapped from the chairs to hold the audience in one place. It was at that point that the audience began to realize this wasn’t part of the show; people began to struggle against their bonds and shouting at the stage.

Bill turned away from the audience, grin still plastered on his face. He stepped to Dipper’s side and slung an arm over his shoulder. “And I gotta thank you, Pine Tree. This whole thing wouldn’t have been possible if you’d trusted Norman even a little. If you’d just told him what you knew about me, he wouldn’t have made a deal with me. Hey, maybe he’d have taken you down to that tomb with you and you could have solved mysteries together, very Hardy Boys.

“But you gave him cryptic warnings and sent him running right into danger.”

Bill stepped back, arms, wide, as he gave Dipper a vicious smirk. His smile vanished when he abruptly stumbled, grabbing at the back of his head. “Ow!”

Mabel was standing behind him, a prop serving platter held over her head. “I’ll do it again, if you don’t get out of Norman’s body right now.”

“Shooting Star, I’m sure you remember I don’t mind pain; I actually think it’s great fun. And this time around, I’m healthy and well-rested, and, most importantly, you don’t know this body’s weaknesses. So I guess we’re on even footing - or would be, if I weren’t fantastically more powerful than you. Plus, you gotta remember any damage you do to this body is going to be hurting Norman more than me.

“I guess the question is, then, what exactly is your game plan here? Me, I’m planning to release these ghosts out onto the rest of the town and see what havoc they can get up to. Maybe you can share what you’re planning so we can compare notes.”

Mabel’s iron-fisted grip on the platter loosened. “I-”

“No, please, your plans are always so fascinating. You know what? Don’t bother. I already know what you’ve got planned. I can SEE inside your HEAD and there’s nothing there!”

“Leave her alone. Your fight is with me.”

Bill spun on his heel and poked Dipper hard in the chest. “You don’t know what I want, Pine Tree, what I’m up to, or who I’m fighting. Typical human, unable to imagine that the universe doesn’t revolve around you.”

“I suppose it revolves around you?”

“Not yet, Pine Tree.” Bill licked his lips and then shoved Dipper back; Dipper stumbled and hit the back of one of the couches. “But you always think big; that’s what I like about you. And before you bring it up, Pine Tree, I’m not going to trade for your body. I like this body. Much sturdier than yours. And, of course, there’s the perks.”

“How about me?”

Bill spun again, back now to Dipper as he looked Mabel up and down. She stood there, fists clenched by her sides and staring fixedly at Bill. He raised a hand and tapped the side of his face.

“Now that’s a thought, Shooting Star. Trade in the seer for little old you. Some might say that’s a downgrade.”

“You wouldn’t, though,” Mabel said.

Bill shivered, running his hands up his arms. “And what makes you think that, Shooting Star? What makes you think that you’re worth more than the ability to control the dead? What makes you think I’d release my hold on this power for you?”

Mabel’s expression didn’t waver. Dipper didn’t see a crack or a hint of a smile. The silence stretched on for a minute, long enough that Bill began shifting uncomfortably. “Come on, out with it, Shooting Star. What makes you think you’re worth it?”

Mabel’s lips quirked upward. “You didn’t kill me when you had the chance.”

Dipper couldn’t see Bill’s - Norman’s - face, but he wouldn’t have been able to pay enough attention to register Bill’s expression. He’d never thought anything would be more horrible than watching his body fighting with Mabel, but no one had ever so starkly pointed out that during that brief period, Bill could have hurt or killed someone Dipper cared about.

That Bill could have used Dipper’s hands to kill his sister.

“That vacant smile conceals a mind as sharp as a whip, doesn’t it? But not quite sharp enough, Shooting Star. I’ve got my hands full dealing with this right now. If I weren’t - if this were any other person, any other day - well, I’d be tempted.”

Dipper wanted to hit that stupid demon right in the back of his stupid head. The only thing that stopped him was that he didn’t want to hurt his friend. Even if he hadn’t trusted him enough to…

“You got one thing wrong, Bill.”

“What?” Bill twisted his head around; Dipper got the feeling he wanted to twist it the full way around.

Dipper looked at the air above Norman’s left shoulder. If Norman was half as good a person as Dipper - which wasn’t hard - he was bound to be hanging around somewhere trying to find a way to help. “I told him my name, Bill.”

“What?”

“My name. My real name. Your kind put a lot of stock in things like that, don’t they? You can use a true name to bind a demon, can’t you?”

Bill narrowed Norman’s eyes and swung his body around to join his head. “The things you know about my kind could fit on a postage stamp, Pine Tree. But names...names are powerful.” A thoughtful look crossed his face, and then Bill’s expression hardened, sharpened. “Oh, you’re a clever little puppet, Pine Tree. You were trying to trick me into releasing my hold on this body and let Norman back in so I could root around in his memories, so I could find out your real name. But that’s not important, Pine Tree. Nothing is as important as what I’m doing right now.”

Dipper smiled at Bill. He met Mabel’s eyes and winked at her.

“That’s not even close to what my plan is, Bill. Norman, repeat after me! _Fidentus omnium. Magister mentium. Magnesium ad hominem. Magnum opus. Habeas corpus. Inceptus Nolanus overratus. Magister mentium. Magister mentium.Magister mentium._ ”

Bill’s eyes widened the moment Dipper began the incantation, but at that point, Mabel stepped up and hit him as hard as she could with the platter, sending him into unconsciousness and opening the way for Dipper, Mabel and Norman to walk into his dreams.

Dipper grabbed Mabel’s hand, and thought he might have felt the brush of something cold on his other hand. The world shifted and darkened as they left the waking world behind.

Dipper just hoped that this wouldn’t turn out to be any stupider than anything else he’d done since he arrived in Gravity Falls. He suspected, however, that entering Bill Cipher’s mind for the hope of finding some way of beating him again was the stupidest thing he’d ever done, at which point his only hope was that it would all be worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey again! I know I’ve been on the sidelines for most of this story; I’m sure you’re delighted to see my triumphant return. After all, what’s a good story without a fantastic antagonist? Stupid, that’s what. Mind if I come in, look around for a bit?
> 
> Haha, just kidding. I’m not a vampire; I don’t need an invitation. Man, this place is a dump. You could tighten up the decor a bit, add some splashes of color, maybe a little octarine. And I applaud your courage in wearing that.
> 
> Anyway, I just wanted to give you a friendly warning before we go on. Don’t try anything funny.
> 
> I’m serious. What with all this new-found power, I decided to take a few precautions, in case any of you decide to try anything. Oh, it’s nothing to worry about unless you decide to try to find a way to stop me - or I think it’s funny. Haha, do you think it’d be funnier if I got your head spinning around doing that pea soup thing, or if I did that whole Beetlejuice thing and brought your furniture to life?
> 
> Oh, to hell with it. I’m going to come back once I’m done with these jerks and get...creative.
> 
> Oh, don’t give me that look. You came into this knowing I’m a demon. I don’t know what else you might have expected.


	9. Chapter 9

Norman had had only a moment to grab Dipper’s hand before he finished the incantation, a moment before the auditorium faded away to be replaced by a vast forest, a maze of paths winding through the shadow of spindly branches. The grass underfoot was spiky and unyielding, and the few glimpses of the sky revealed boiling red and purple that put Norman on edge.

“I expected more clowns.”

Dipper stepped up next to Mabel and patted her shoulder. “Don’t forget that Bill Cipher’s attitude is just an act. It’s not going to be clowns and bright colors. Expect twisty psychological mazes, your worst nightmares brought to life, that sort of thing.”

“And we don’t have a lot of time,” Norman added. “Bill Cipher is a lot of things, but slow is not one of them.”

“Grab hands!” Dipper snapped, snagging Norman’s hand in his own. This was all in their heads, Norman knew, but the warmth of Dipper’s hand against his own felt so genuine he wanted to stop and savor it, the first real thing he’d felt in two days. “In here, Bill might take one of our shapes to trick us, so don’t let go for anything.”

“Does that mean I’m going to be your left hand, Dipper? I’ll pick up anything you need picked up, and if you need a weapon, you can go ahead and flail me around like a - a flail.”

“Hopefully it won’t come to that,” Norman said. “Let’s get going.”

He ended up in the lead, winding along narrow passages lined by wizened trees and lit by faint blue auras surrounding individual stumps. They moved in relative silence, at least until a howl shook the ground, and Dipper froze in place behind Norman, bringing Norman to a halt and causing Mabel to run into him.

“That’s him,” Dipper whispered. “We’ve got to hurry.”

“I’m trying, but I don’t have any idea where we’re supposed to be going. All these trees look alike.”

“No they don’t,” Mabel said. “That one’s got a picture of a pine tree on it, and that one’s got a drawing of a puppy! Can we check that one out?”

Norman turned to Mabel. She was staring at an apparently unremarkable spot of bark on one of the trees. He peered at it, finding the tree just as unremarkable as it had seemed earlier. He stepped closer to Mabel and pulled her head up with his free hand. Her eyes were clear, unclouded, and with no facets or flaws to them. Nothing to suggest she had the talent of mediums. And yet…

“Mabel. You see things other people don’t.”

“Haha, all the time!”

“But in here. Do you see anything that looks like Bill?”

Mabel frowned. She examined a tree near her, and then began hopping back to look at other trees. Another howl shook the forest and Dipper shoved at Mabel from behind.

“Come on, let’s go!”

“Give me a minute, Dipper! I think I saw a door with a triangle on it a little while back.”

“I don’t think we’ve got a minute. Run!”

The next few minutes were a frantic run through more twisty passages; Norman wasn’t sure if they were returning to the entrance, running deeper into the maze, or something else. All he knew is that they were entrusting their lives to Mabel, who while strange, could see something in Bill Cipher’s mind neither of them could.

She stopped abruptly, sending Dipper and Norman careening into her.

“Mabel!”

“I think this is it,” Mabel said reverently. “It’s got a picture of Bill on it, and some other squiggly lines.”

“And what do we do with it?”

Mabel turned back to Dipper, smiling smugly. “We open it.” She pushed at the tree’s surface, and the whole thing swung aside to reveal a strange, shadowy scene. “Come on.” She clambered in, dragging Norman and Dipper with her, and once inside-

The world went white, a searing flash that overwhelmed Norman’s senses. Laughter rang in the infinite space around them and then Bill Cipher appeared before them, floating above them. “Did you honestly think this was going to get you anywhere, Pine Tree? I am the master of the mental arts; nothing can outwit me inside my own mind.” He floated down to eye-level and drifted toward Norman. “And you - clever thinking, following them in here. But once again, this is my realm. This is my talent. Maybe if we were fighting with ghosts, Eyeball, you’d have a chance.”

“That’s why we brought Mabel.”

“Yeah!” Mabel stretched out a hand and summoned a beam of rainbow light that pierced through the center of Bill Cipher’s eye. He howled in pain, grabbing at the eye as it smoked.

As he screamed, his form fuzzed and began smoking and evaporating. “You fools! You’ll never know what a mistake it was getting rid of me! You’ll regret thiiiiiiiiiii-”

His eye, and the rest of his body, vanished with a ‘pop’, leaving his top hat to fall to something approaching the ground with a clatter.

Mabel was staring at her hand, wide-eyed. “Wow. I don’t know the power of my own hand.”

“That was your mind, Mabel. You proved you’re stronger than him.” Norman smiled at her when she looked up at him. “It was really cool.”

The whiteness around them started to darken, vague shapes forming in the darkness.

“What’s happening?” Dipper demanded.

“Whoops! Let me get us a portal out of here.” Mabel gestured, opening a hole in the darkening air. “Come on, let’s go and see if we can whip up a victory dinner.”

Together, the three of them stepped out of the fading remains of Bill Cipher’s mind, and into victory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...


	10. Chapter 10

They stumbled back into the glaring light of the auditorium. Norman saw Neil sitting up rubbing his head, likely none the worse for wear. And Dipper was still holding his hand. Flushed and invigorated by their victory, Norman leaned in and gave Dipper a quick kiss.

Everything seemed to slow in the moment following the kiss. A tension seemed to gather in the air, both on stage and off, as Dipper’s face crumpled, twisting in disgust. “What in the world was that?”

“I…” Norman let go of Dipper’s hand and stepped back away from him, his heart racing. He thought he’d felt a connection between the two of them, more than just the friendship sparked by shared interests. But there was no way to explain that in the face of Dipper’s disgusted fury.

“What? I may be a little out there and spend too much time thinking about things like aliens and werewolves and stuff, but I’m not a freak.”

“I’m not a-”

“And Bill was wrong. This was all your fault, digging around in stuff you didn’t understand. I was planning to have a nice, normal evening, but instead you dragged me into another life-or-death struggle. And now I can see why. You thought if we got scared enough, maybe I’d be desperate enough to kiss you? Don’t make me laugh.”

“D - Dipper, I didn’t mean-”

“Get out of here,” Dipper snapped. “On second thought, I’m going home. And if I see you within a mile of the Mystery Shack, you’ll regret it. Come on, Mabel.”

Dipper stormed off the stage. Mabel drew closer, and for a moment, Norman thought she was going to apologize, maybe agree to talk to Dipper.

But she instead sprinkled the remnants of the note Norman had given her, with his address on it, over him, shaking her head. “I should have known, seeing how you’ve been driving around the country all this time with that faggot.” Her knife-edged smile glinted with the light reflected from her braces, and then she was gone.

The rest of the audience had cleared out, and that left only Norman huddled on the stage. He tried to keep in the tears. He’d been called worse for years before anyone in town had ever realized that being different didn’t make Norman worse, but it hurt more having someone he’d trusted turn on him.

He wanted...to go home. He wanted to go back to where he knew every ghost and everyone knew him and liked him and…

Forget it. He didn’t want that. He’d hoped...he’d found a kindred spirit. And it hurt so, so badly.

He wanted to die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...


	11. Chapter 11

Dipper landed on the stage lit by spotlights, framed by Mabel and Norman, and for a moment, everything was perfect. They were heroes, had saved Norman from a fate worse than death, and, he saw, as the green chains evaporated from the audience members, saved the town, as well. He was going to be such a hero, and no one would be able to deny the truth of the supernatural now.

A tug at his hand made him turn to Norman, who had pulled from his grasp and was by Neil’s side. The red-haired boy looked weak and bruised.

“Come on, let’s get you to a doctor.”

“Hey, Norman.” Dipper jogged to Norman’s side. “We can help get Neil there, and then maybe celebratory milkshakes?”

Norman snorted. “Why in the world would I want to have celebratory milkshakes with you?”

“Because we beat the bad guy, freed the ghosts-”

“Yeah, and now that I’m done, I can go home.” Norman looked up and met Dipper’s eyes. His strangely faceted blue eyes were narrowed. “I came up here for one reason, Dipper, and that was to deal with ghost problems. I’m done now, so I can go home without having to deal with weirdos who believe in all that paranormal stuff.”

“I - I thought we were getting along.”

“We worked together fine, Dipper, at least until you lied to me and let me get possessed by a demon. Or didn’t you feel the least bit guilty about that?”

Dipper looked around wildly, hoping for support, but Mabel was nowhere to be seen, and the audience seemed to have cleared out. “Everyone makes mistakes-”

“And maybe I’d care if we were friends, Dipper. But we’re not. This was a job, and now it’s done, and I’m going home before you get anyone else I care about hurt or worse.”

Dipper could do nothing but watch in shock as Norman and Neil limped out of the auditorium, the latter offering a vicious glare to Dipper just before they left. Norman didn’t even look back, didn’t think Dipper was worth even a last cutting remark.

It was...he sat down hard on the stage, and didn’t even fight the tears as they welled up. He thought he’d found someone similar enough to him that he wouldn’t look at Dipper like he was a freak, someone who could handle being Dipper’s friend all the time, not just during the supernatural weirdness. But in the end, he didn’t have anyone. Even Mabel had vanished with her friends, and Dipper was alone...as always.

It hurt so, so badly, moreso because he’d had moments when he’d had friends, so he knew what he’d lost.

Fuck, he wanted to go home and bury himself in books and junk food and pretend no one outside his room matter.

Fuck, he wanted to die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...


	12. Chapter 12

Mabel tumbled from the vortex onto the stage. The audience members were rising unsteadily from their seats, she could see Candy and Grenda helping Neil to his feet, and a mass of pink slammed into her. Waddles squealed happily as Mabel rubbed his head affectionately, at least until the pig stiffened and fell over dead.

“Waddles!” Mabel fell to her knees, cradling the pig in her arms. “Waddles, whatever happened to you?”

She began sniffling, pressing her face against the pig’s still chest, and a thought occurred. “Wait. What did happen to you? We took you to the vet two weeks ago. You were fine. And you weren’t even in the auditorium when we started the play.”

A wave of grief washed over Mabel, a sharp pierce to the heart that would have sent her to her knees if she hadn’t already been there. She stood cautiously, frowning at her surroundings. It looked just like the auditorium, but she had expected that. The audience had emptied, leaving just her and Waddles on the stage-

“Oh my god. This is a dream.” It was just like a dream. The world went from being one thing to another, abandoning and gaining elements as needed. Things happened that didn’t make sense. Things worked on assumption and imagination and-

“Come out here, Bill.”

“I underestimated you, Shooting Star. Something I can promise is not going to happen in the-urk!”

Bill’s ethereal form slammed into the floor of the stage, propelled by Mabel’s sheer desire that he hit it at great force. He tried to speak again, but she slammed him into the ceiling, and then back to the floor again.

“This is probably a hilarious bit of comeuppance, but it’s hardly original, Shooting Star.”

“Original? I’ll show you original.” Glowering at Bill Cipher, knowing in the depths of her heart that he was likely trying to torment her brother with visions of his worst nightmares, she went the quick, direct route, and stuffed Bill into a jam jar.

“Hey! What are you doing?”

Mabel walked over to the jam jar and picked it up, examining the trapped triangular being. She smiled at the sight of him banging against the interior, and shook it a little. Bill stumbled, and seemed, if possible, to grow angrier.

“Well, isn’t this a surprise? Me trapping little old you. You see, I thought about why you thought I was such a good catch, and then I remembered. You’re silly and ridiculous, just like me. It must mean you’ve got a great imagination, that you’re creative. It must mean that the key to power in the mental realm isn’t boring stuff like being focused or serious, but knowing how to turn a thought into reality. And I’m good at that. Really good. Maybe not as good as you, Bill Cipher, but right now I don’t need to. I just need to remember that I would do _anything_ for my brother, and right now you’re standing in the way of me rescuing him.”

She shook the jar again before holding Bill up to her eye-level. “So how about you tell me where to find Dipper and Norman, and I don’t try to get...creative?”

“You really want to ask me for advice, Shooting Star?”

“The name is _Mabel_ , you big squinty triangle eye thingy, and if you don’t get me to my brother in the next attosecond I’m going to bedazzle your cornea!”

A door popped into existence in front of Mabel with a pine tree carved into it.

" _That's_ better. See how nice things are when we cooperate?"

Mabel kicked down the door and strode through it. Dipper was hunched up on a stage similar to the one Mabel had just left, arms hugged around himself as he whimpered quietly.

"Get up, Dipper; we've been Inceptioned!"

"Wha?" He lifted his head to reveal a heart-breaking expression. His cheeks were streaked with the tracks of dried tears, his eyes still streaming. His entire face was slumped, as if the determination Mabel had grown used to seeing in him had collapsed, taking the rest of him with it. Mabel wasn't the sort to evade emotional moments, so she dragged Dipper up to his feet and hugged him as hard as she could.

"It's a dream, Dipper."

Against her shoulder, Dipper shook his head. "It wasn't. I know-"

"Come on. Doesn't it strike you as weird that the minute you beat Bill Cipher - a _dream demon_ , your worst nightmare comes true?"

Dipper sniffled, unresponsive.

"Oh, come on, Dipper. You're stronger than this. It's a bad dream. Just the fevered imaginings of a mad triangle."

"You don't know that."

"Really? You're sitting here all alone, Dipper. That's never gonna happen. I could name a dozen people who'd never leave you alone. You're crying, and I wasn't here to cheer you up. When has that ever happened? Face it, Dipper, this whole thing is a sham, and not a very good one."

Dipper looked uncertain, so Mabel pressed forward. “Dipper, you have to know I would never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever abandon you. And any stupid dream that tells you otherwise is a sign you need more hugs.”

Dipper nodded. But there was still something in his expression, something haunted, and it blindsided her.

“You’re not just moping about me. Someone else walked out on you here. Someone you’re not all that sure about, maybe a new friend. Well, stop moping. It’s dumb.”

“How do you know?” Dipper demanded, tears returning in full force. Mabel patted him on the back, sighing. Boys could be so dumb. It wasn’t their fault, mostly, given that they weren’t supposed to admit they had feelings, and therefore got into the habit of not thinking about them.

Still, it was exhausting sometimes. “It’s dumb because Norman quite possibly thinks you’re the most interesting person he’s ever met. This whole you sitting in an abandoned theater thing is never going to happen, and I’m going to prove it.”

She concentrated, forcing open a door in the dreamscape, one wearing a single eye, unframed by any triangle.

“How did you do that?”

She gave him an exaggerated wink. “I’m a fast learner. Now come on.”

She opened this door more cautiously than the last. The auditorium was darker, the air chiller, a reminder that Norman possessed some amount of power to influence his surroundings. A small form was curled up on the stage.

She heard a strangled sound from her right and then Dipper was running, running toward Norman. “Norman, are you okay?”

“Go away,” Norman grumbled.

Dipper paused, crouched, hand inches from Norman’s shoulders. “Norman? I just wanted to see-”

“I think you made your feelings perfectly clear,” Norman growled. “Unless you’re here to get in one last shot, go away.”

“Okay, Norman, I think you need to take a moment and listen to us, because whatever you think happened-”

“I’m surprised you found time in your busy schedule for a filthy faggot,” Norman hissed.

Dipper lurched away from Norman, and Mabel felt the ground shift under her feet. _Oh_. This might be a little harder than she thought.

Actually, not so much harder. She was Mabel Pines, for goodness sake.

“Norman Babcock,” she snapped, mimicking as best she could the tone of her mother’s voice that could make your spine straighten before your brain engaged. “I deliberately refuse to know what that word means, because it’s a terrible word that shouldn’t be used to refer to anybody. I _certainly_ wouldn’t use it to refer to a boy who actually liked boys, especially a boy who’s as cool as you.”

She folded her arms and glared at Norman, whose face was absolutely wrecked. She let her expression soften. “Norman, whatever you saw in here was dumb and fake and you shouldn’t let it get to you.” He didn’t move, and his expression didn’t shift. “Norman?”

“Norman?” Dipper asked, his voice wavering. “Is that...are you…”

“A faggot?” 

Dipper winced, as if slapped. “No! I mean-” He froze, his eyes widening. “You told me, or a memory of me, that you were, and I - he reacted badly. I wouldn’t, Norman. I don’t - I wouldn’t have any place to judge.”

Mabel’s breath caught in her throat; Norman looked up at Dipper, still pale and shaken, but with something hopeful in his expression.

“I never thought I’d meet someone else who was so interested in the paranormal,” Dipper said. “I was amazed to find someone as smart as you who cared about this stuff. And you...seem to think I’m worth something, that I mean as much to you as you do to me. So there’s no way I’d ever do anything like-urk!”

Norman lunged at Dipper, squeezing him uncomfortably tight around the middle. Mabel turned around in an attempt to give them a modicum of privacy.

“This is touching and all, but it’s not really solving the whole Norman being possessed by a demon thing, is it?”

The jam jar smashed, releasing Bill Cipher to flit into the air between Mabel and the boys.

“But I’m being insensitive to the happy couple. Mazel tov!” Bill threw a handful of teeth into the air; when they hit the ground, they grew into skeletal soldiers that fought each other to the death. “Now that the pleasantries are out of the way, how _were_ you planning to defeat me? Whether or not Shooting Star here managed to catch me by surprise, this is my head, and that means I’m in control here.” He laughed.

“Well, maybe.” Bill spun to face Norman, who was standing now, shielding Dipper from the dream demon. “But we’re not exactly in your head, are we? We’re in mine, too.”

“Haha, not quite, kid. It might be your head, but it’s my mind.”

“But all our consciousnesses are crammed all in one place,” Norman said thoughtfully. “My body, four minds, and two souls. I think that means there’s a connection. Insight I can use against you.”

“Haha, you’re stalling, Eyeball.”

“Am I? We came in here to find a way to stop you, and you’ve been giving us the runaround. I wonder why? I think it’s because we’re onto something. I think you’re right that it’s not as easy as knowing your name. But we’re close, and getting closer.”

“Ahaha, maybe I should just make your brain sizzle like a fried egg, Eyeball.”

“I don’t think you can. You would have done something to me if you thought there was something you _could_ do. But I think you know there’s something I can do to you.” Norman smirked at Bill. “I never knew how much power I had over spirits until you showed me, Bill. Mabel might be able to fight you in here, but I can kick you out.”

Bill’s eye narrowed. “The medium’s powers sticks with the body, Eyeball.”

“Yeah, but who’s in charge while we’re sitting in your mind? The guy who’s still getting used to walking, or the one who’s had these powers his whole life?” Norman closed his eyes, and his hands began to glow green. The glow then spread down his form, outlining the stage and eventually Mabel and Dipper. And then everything wrenched sideways, a jolt that sent Mabel stumbling.

"No! You can't do this! I am the master of the mental arts! I can't lose - not this time! When I'm back, you'll be so-"

The world around them melted into a wide suburban square, a place lined with quaint shops and spindly trees. There was something oddly familiar about the scene.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I’d rather you didn’t wander around my memories,” Norman said.

“Oh, sure! You wanna kick us out, or…”

“I think it’s safer for you to do it.”

Mabel grinned and wiggled her fingers, pushing her will against Norman’s mindscape. A door popped into existence, a short pink door painted with hearts. “Ready to go!”

Dipper grabbed her hand, grabbed Norman’s, and pushed through the door. She stumbled backward as she was shocked back into her own body; she saw Norman and Dipper stumbling as well. Out beyond the stage, the auditorium was a scene of carnage. People were scattered across the remnants of the seating, soot and ectoplasm splashed across the walls. Grunkle Stan was standing in the center of the auditorium, panting, with a hand vacuum clenched in his hand.

“Kids! You’re alive! Or undead. Please tell me you’re not undead; I don’t want to have to lie to your parents about having to bury your ashes on hallowed ground.”

“If I were undead, I would be a vampire, and sparkling,” Mabel insisted. “Ow.” She winced as her head spiked with pain. “And I wouldn’t have a headache. Do you think Triangle Man gets headaches?”

“Probably not. We’re just not used to using those mental muscles,” Norman replied. “Oh jeez, Neil!”

“I’m okay.” The boy waved vaguely from behind a couch.

“He has a concussion,” Candy corrected. “Norman gave him quite a whack-”

“Billman did it, not Norman,” Mabel said decisively. “And maybe we should get you to a hospital?”

“Nah, he’ll be okay.” Grunkle Stan clambered onto the stage. “And as the ghost party seems to have died down, let’s get you kids home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ll be the first to admit that wasn’t an ideal resolution. Sure, I probably could have taken them. I just...didn’t feel like it. I just wanted to get back to my WOW guild.
> 
> You’re going to regret it if you keep giving me that sarcastic look.
> 
> What am I going to do? Sure, maybe I can’t go all Ghostbusters II on you, but I can still lurk in your mind and sow nightmares. You know, the stuff you dreamed about the last time you woke up in a cold sweat. Maybe add the stuff that makes you sit in your room feeling worthless sometimes.
> 
> …
> 
> Hey. What the hell?
> 
> Did you honestly spend the last couple of chapters warding your computer? Impossible; you don’t have that sort of know-how. And when did you get a cat?
> 
> ...
> 
> Fine.
> 
> Whatever.
> 
> I don’t care about this anymore. It wouldn’t have been that funny anyway.
> 
> I’m going to get a drink.


	13. Chapter 13

Dipper woke up early Saturday morning, a knot in his stomach. They might have been victorious over Bill Cipher, released the spirits of Gravity Falls (Norman had spent a part of the celebratory party talking to a woman who’d died sixty years ago), and scored enough candy for Mabel to throw into a kiddie pool and swim in, but Norman and the others were going home today.

Mabel was irritatingly chipper, waking with a loud, “Good morning!” and shoving a bright green sweater with ghosts on it into Dipper’s arms.

“You should wear that; it complements your eyes.”

Dipper looked at the sweater dubiously. “When have I ever cared about complementing my eyes? And why did you buy this?”

Mabel draped herself over Dipper with an exaggerated sigh. “You should care about how your eyes look, at least if you’re planning to win over any cute boys.”

“Jeez, will you shut up about Mermando already?” Dipper demanded, trying to shove her off the bed.

Mabel shifted, weighing Dipper down. “I’m not talking about Mermando; I’m talking about Norman!”

Dipper felt his stomach flip. “That’s not...I’m not - I mean...how do you know I even have a chance?"

Mabel stared at Dipper for a long, interminable moment and then fell off the bed laughing uncontrollably. It went on for a full minute before he nudged her with his foot. 

“What’s so funny?”

“The thought - that you - that you wouldn’t have a - chance with - hgk!” She froze, and Dipper felt a moment of panic at her pained expression.

“Are you okay?”

Mabel nodded. “Just...choked on some spit. Oh, gosh, haha, I think you broke me.”

“Shut up!” Dipper snapped. He folded his arms and leaned back against the wall. “This is serious. I mean, maybe I like him...a little. But he’s so - and I’m-”

“Okay, I’m going to go through this only one more time, Dipper, and then you’re on your own.” Mabel climbed up onto the bed and grabbed both of Dipper’s shoulders, holding him in place. “Norman thinks you’re the - the bee’s knees. I have watched him moon around for a week and a half staring at you. I would bet - I would bet Waddles that if you asked, he’d agree in a heartbeat.”

“What.”

“Yes. If he turns you down, if he looks you in the eye and says, ‘Dipper, I just don’t like you that way’, I’ll - I’ll sell Waddles to that farm down the road.”

Dipper stared at Mabel, at the intensity of her gaze, one so much like his own. He’d never seen her so serious about anything except Waddles himself.

“Mabel, you don’t-”

“So you think about that, Dipper. I promise you, you don’t need any stupid plans or lists or anything. Just go down there and be yourself.”

“But he lives like a million miles away!”

Mabel’s small frown faded back into a grin. “Don’t tell me you’re going to let a little thing like logistics worry you. Just go for it.”

She was right. Dipper nodded, grabbed the green sweater, and headed to the shower. He emerged twenty minutes later, ready for anything, only to be waylaid by Mabel wielding an eyelash pencil or something.

“Okay, if you can just let me touch this up here-”

Dipper knocked her hand away. “I’m fine, Mabel!”

“You once went three weeks without showering; your definition of fine is not to be trusted.”

Dipper weaseled away from her and walked toward the door. “You told me to be myself, and this is myself. Deal with it.”

They hadn’t had any specific plans to see Norman and the others before they left, so Dipper took the cart to the motel, stopping at the parking lot and getting out to steel his nerves. He’d been there a minute or so before someone tapped him on the shoulder.

“Yah!”

He flailed out, narrowly hitting Norman, who was wearing jeans and a black T-shirt, looking somehow taller and more adult not being swaddled in his hoodie. Norman was smiling, arms hanging loosely by his sides.

“Nice sweater,” Norman said.

Feeling small and childish, Dipper shrugged. “Mabel said it complemented my eyes.”

“Hm.” Norman took a step closer and leaned in close. “I have to agree with her. The ghosts might be a little cute for you, though.”

“Heh heh, yeah. I think Mabel bought it just to embarrass me.”

Norman made an affirmative noise, and Dipper almost gave up right there. There was no way he could do this, dressed in a stupid cute sweater and-

Dipper stopped thinking, grabbed Norman by the shoulders and kissed him. It was awkward and stupid and probably the worst kiss in the history of the art, but it was a clear statement of intent, better than talking because there was no way to stumble over your tongue and screw it up.

He tried to pull back after a moment, only to find Norman’s hand clenching the front of his sweater. This close, Dipper could see the facets in Norman’s eyes. He checked himself before he could think, ‘like a sapphire’, because there was a level of sappiness he would not pursue.

“Now, I’m not certain how people do things in Gravity Falls, but where I come from, kissing a boy usually means-”

“I like you,” Dipper blurted. “A lot. You’re cool, and smart, and I think it’s awesome that you can see the dead, even if you didn’t tell me earlier, and wow your eyes are pretty-”

Norman leaned in and pecked Dipper on the cheek, stopping him mid-sentence.

“That answers that question. I guess it’s good I like you, too. A lot.” His eyes were crinkled, almost squinting, and he was smiling. Dipper wasn’t sure if he was being made fun of.

He decided not, because Norman linked their hands, even though he took a careful step away. “It might have been a little easier if you’d told me this earlier in the week.”

Dipper shrugged. “I’m not always on the ball.”

“Hm.” Norman dragged Dipper back to the cart and sat in the passenger’s seat and waited for Dipper to sit next to him. “I mean, we can decide this was nice but probably won’t happen again, due to, you know, distance. Or we could write and chat and try to figure out how to meet up.”

Dipper nodded, only vaguely aware of what Norman was saying. His head was floating from the shock of the kiss.

“I mean, if you just want to be friends, that’d be, well, fine-”

“What? Who said anything about just being friends? You’re - I mean, you’re _you_ , and that’s - if I had options half as good as you at home, I’d - I’m babbling.”

Norman was smirking at Dipper, he was sure, now.

“Maybe a little. Can I guess that means you want to try being, ah, whatever long-distance?”

“Yes!” Dipper, too late, tried to slouch make to maintain whatever semblance of cool he had. “I mean-”

“You’re wearing a shirt with cartoon ghosts on it. You can pretend to be cool some other time.” Norman’s smile was gentler than before; it made Dipper’s chest feel twisted and fluttery.

He glanced in the direction of the motel. “Don’t you need to get going soon?”

“I’m packed. I can wait until Courtney yells for me. Do you have anywhere to be?”

Dipper couldn’t think, at the moment, of anything that he would have thought was more important than trying to enjoy whatever this was until Norman had to leave, so he shook his head.

Norman tugged Dipper closer to him, and Dipper let his head fall against Norman’s shoulder, which is how Courtney found them an hour later.

“This is ridiculous,” she said. “Norman gets a boyfriend before I do. Norman, we’re leaving in fifteen minutes. Say your goodbyes or whatever.”

Norman kissed Dipper on the cheek and pulled back to climb from the cart. “Um, your sister got my number.” He rummaged through his pockets and produced a scrap of paper and wrote on it. “I’ve got the same name like everywhere on the internet. Look me up, alright?”

“Sure.” Dipper smiled weakly at Norman. “Maybe see if you can back out to Gravity Falls next year?”

“Yeah.” Dipper stood up and pulled Norman into a hug, one as tight as he could manage. When Courtney coughed, he pulled away and hopped back into the cart.

Mabel found him in the middle of the woods an hour later. When he looked up at her, she pointed at her forehead. “Twin telepathy, remember?”

“I think it might be a ‘master of the mental arts’ thing, actually.”

“Mistress, I think,” Mabel said. She sat in the passenger’s seat and patted Dipper’s shoulder. “It go okay? You don’t look as happy as a boy with a new boyfriend should.”

“It went fine. It’s just that Norman has to go back to who-knows-where.”

“ _I_ know where,” Mabel said smugly.

“What?”

With a flourish, Mabel pulled a folded piece of paper from her shirt and handed it to Dipper. He unfolded it gingerly and read the contents.

“What?”

“He lives in Blithe Hollow, Dipper.” Mabel rapped her fist against his forehead. “You’d know that if you’d bothered to ask.”

“Blithe…” Dipper shook his head. “That’s like-”

“Fifteen minutes away from Mom and Dad’s. Thirty by bus. I googled it.”

Dipper tried to say something, but the words wouldn’t come out.

Mabel just leaned back in her seat. “A funny old world, that. And think, you wouldn’t even know if it weren’t for your amazing sister Mabel.”

“You’re great,” Dipper said, and tugged Mabel into a sideways hug.

“Of course I am. The question is, is it enough for you to get me ice cream?”

“Sure, let’s go. We’ve got at least a couple of weeks before we’ve got to go home.”

For all that there were a few weeks left, that week felt like the climax of it. They had fun, Dipper dragged them on more adventures, but they’d done something big, and Dipper had found something worth taking a leap for.

So it was all good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EVERY TRUE STORY ENDS IN DEATH


	14. Chapter 14

Touching, wasn’t that?

I mean, not my cup of tea, but I prefer cold sewage.

Anyway, this is just to remind you that I warned you not to read the epilogue.

I mean, you’ve got a happy ending. Boy meets boy, boy saves boy from possession, boy gets boy.

So this is your last warning.

Pretend the story’s over.

Don’t keep going.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE’S A MONSTER AT THE END OF THIS BOOK.


	15. Chapter 15

The next time you sleep, you find yourself in a movie theater. It is dark enough that you can’t see the far walls, or the ceiling; it occurs to you that the room might be much larger than you might assume.

The ground has a strange texture, cracking underfoot as you move.

The screen is huge, silvery and oddly stationary, less like a physical object and more like a window. You can see Norman Babcock, from the movie ‘Paranorman’, on the screen. His form is outlined in eldritch green light, and before him is Bill Cipher, a yellow triangle man with a top hat and bow tie.

Bill Cipher is screaming in rage as his body fades from sight, and then Norman turns, revealing Dipper and Mabel Pines. Mabel does something to the air, opening a door through which the trio steps.

“Fantastic acting on my part, don’t you think?”

You turn, startled by the interruption of your viewing. Sitting on one of the seats is...well, Bill Cipher. You’d never thought about it, watching ‘Gravity Falls’, that Bill Cipher is an otherworldly creature.

But here, you can see his form is a sharp-edged, two-dimensional one, a hole, a window, or a door in reality, something through which an image is projected, one that exists in stark shades that hurt your eyes.

Bill Cipher is wrong, and it is painful to look at.

“All that ‘this can’t be happening,’ and ‘no!’ I considered adding a skyward scream, but I thought that might be a bit much. What do you think?”

You consider pointing out that you saw Bill being defeated, but he beats you to the punch, floating up so that his eye is at the same level as yours. Looking at it, you can feel it looking through you, picking apart everything that makes you, you.

“One thing I’ve found too many antagonists don’t understand is that sometimes it’s best to cut your losses and take a break. Maybe even give your enemies something to feel good about, let them feel safe for a while.”

He floats in a circle around you, and you don’t know how something without a mouth can grin, but you can feel that he is. “Another thing they never tend to realize is that you should never make a plan that has the possibility of failure. You should make sure that you get something you want no matter what happens.

“Humans, after all, are very short-sighted. They rarely think beyond, ‘I should stop that dream demon from making us homeless’, ‘I should stop that dream demon from possessing my brother and destroying his most prized possession,’ or ‘I should stop that dream demon from destroying the entire town with an army of the undead’. 

“And to make it worse, they confuse what I’m doing with what I want. And what do I want?

“ _ **Fire and wonder.**_

“You ponder, of course, why I’ve bothered to tell you any of this. The way I figure it, even if I told you my entire plan, the exact steps I plan to take to achieve my goals, _there’s nothing you can do about it._ You have no way to warn these little tykes of what’s to come. Given the failure of that whole torturing you as punishment for my failure, this seems the best way to make you squirm. Well, for now.

“Until then, ciao!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is really me this time, no cryptic warnings or anything. I've had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> Anyway, thus ends "Things That Go Bump", the first story in the "Fire and Wonder" series.
> 
> Once I sit down and start writing again, I'll get to work on "Tiger Tiger Burning Bright"


End file.
